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Professional Life of IAS Officers' Spouses

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Comments

  • Agree with Neanderthal..I am sure people are thriving well while at the same time serving the nation. But what prompted me to comment was @Victor : Dude, seriously what is your point out here ? Though your story applies the other way round as well (man betraying wife etc. and please, what do you mean by husband GIVING freedom to wives? ) but not getting into it. The discussion was a genuine query by rrb14. Let's not deviate into unnecessary stories of friends and generalize things based on them.

    Thanks
    It is not an unnecessary story if you live in a life of reality. The IAS/IPS/IFS also have sexual desires, they are not abnormal. And that's why i mentioned that one can confirm what is going on in name of FREEDOm by your friends who have been working in such cities as Bangalore/PUne and they see many such married professional females indulging in it.

    So if you want to debate just in emotions, then you are right. But if you want to see reality... just pick your phone, call your friends and confirm...




  • It is not necessary if a person wants to cheat his/her partner has to be away for them to do it.. I also beg to differ from your comment that working women are more prone to cheating .. This is an extremely gender insensitive comment..and i hope @moderator has taken note ... I hope u reconsider your comment in future .. Male and female both have equal rights to work and live life it is extremely unfair to malign a particular gender with irresponsible comments ..
    I don't say that for cheating, being away is must. But being away is one of the most favourable conditions for such instances.

    And regarding your notion of gender insensitivity.. better call any of your friends who is working in MNC and confirm from him rather than being blind follower of Women Rights.
  • I disagree. IFS doesn't pose a problem if your spouse if working for an MNC/TNC. You will be posted in cities where you spouse can be posted by his/her firm as well, and when in India, you're majorly going to be in Delhi. Very li'l problem.

    Life is not all good after 10 years of service in the IAS/IPS. What if you are allocated least developed states as your cadre? Not everyone comes on Central Deputation and even if they do, that's 7 years at the outside. Thereafter, back to the cadre for cooling off- a minimum of 3 years.

    Central Services are better in this regard. An IRS officer, or an IA&AS officer can spend his entire career in cities like Delhi, Mumbai, Hyderabad and Bangalore.
    The problem in IFS is that one could end up in countries where the opportunities are severely limited.

    I would say any of these situations are all workable. There would be a few difficult years for sure, but that is the norm in any situation where both are in generally successful careers. Even pvt sector guys who are in traveling jobs go through this. The key is to plan major personal decisions (when to start family, choice of posting and location etc) well in advance.
  • There is no social life when both husband and wife are professionals.

    I have many friends in Bangalore/Pune who are in IT/software sector and they very well narrate what is happening in the name of "women empowerment".

    One of my friends in Accenture tells that he had physical relations with her co-staff who is married and her husband is in ONGC. Her husband has blind faith in her and thinks that he is giving some sort of freedom to his wife to achieve her professional goals.

    But eventually if you would like to verify it, you can call up and ask any of your friends in such areas about what is happening there? There has been flood of such incidents in which wife living apart from her husband in other town is eventually making full use of her freedom, and their stupid husbands take pride in the feeling of giving their wives free hand in a society where free sex is on bloom.

    The friend i am telling about has just had a recent encounter (i.e. sex) with that girl (married) in Royal Orchid hotel in Bangalore. There are plenty of such incidents that are on rise and that is totally NATURAL because a woman today has multiple options to satisfy her lust if her husband is living outside.

    This is also the reason that educated and professional girls nowadays prefer those men to be their husbands who can give her FREEDOM because they know that such stupid men are a boon for them and they can enjoy this Freedom with any men of their liking....



    Your post is offensive and does not belong on forumias.

  • It is not necessary if a person wants to cheat his/her partner has to be away for them to do it.. I also beg to differ from your comment that working women are more prone to cheating .. This is an extremely gender insensitive comment..and i hope @moderator has taken note ... I hope u reconsider your comment in future .. Male and female both have equal rights to work and live life it is extremely unfair to malign a particular gender with irresponsible comments ..
    I don't say that for cheating, being away is must. But being away is one of the most favourable conditions for such instances.

    And regarding your notion of gender insensitivity.. better call any of your friends who is working in MNC and confirm from him rather than being blind follower of Women Rights.
    I am not going to be dragged in anymore in this unnecessary banter.. i am deeply sorry that you harbour this kind of feudalistic thoughts.. I really don't know what has induced so much bitterness in you... I can only hope u will be able to grow over it..
    This kind of mentality will hinder you and result in your social exclusion.. Because as you have seen from the above comments none of the guys support your view ...
    Rest up to you if you want to change it will be for your own good otherwise you will be excluded and cornered that's all ..

  • It is not necessary if a person wants to cheat his/her partner has to be away for them to do it.. I also beg to differ from your comment that working women are more prone to cheating .. This is an extremely gender insensitive comment..and i hope @moderator has taken note ... I hope u reconsider your comment in future .. Male and female both have equal rights to work and live life it is extremely unfair to malign a particular gender with irresponsible comments ..
    I don't say that for cheating, being away is must. But being away is one of the most favourable conditions for such instances.

    And regarding your notion of gender insensitivity.. better call any of your friends who is working in MNC and confirm from him rather than being blind follower of Women Rights.
    Dude...are you like thirteen or what?
  • If you really want to live a 'real' life, look around you @Victor . Look at all the working mothers who manage to do fantastic jobs at home and in office. A working woman is NOT an object of derision. A working woman staying away from her husband is not a sexual predator, a man-hungry vixen as you make her out to be. A woman choosing her career along with her family is not inherently immoral.

    Your arguments make me wince from inside. I have a working single-mother, and you clearly don't know what 'reality' is. So, pardon me if I sound rude, but just shut your abominable trap hitherto fore!
  • I disagree. IFS doesn't pose a problem if your spouse if working for an MNC/TNC. You will be posted in cities where you spouse can be posted by his/her firm as well, and when in India, you're majorly going to be in Delhi. Very li'l problem.

    Life is not all good after 10 years of service in the IAS/IPS. What if you are allocated least developed states as your cadre? Not everyone comes on Central Deputation and even if they do, that's 7 years at the outside. Thereafter, back to the cadre for cooling off- a minimum of 3 years.

    Central Services are better in this regard. An IRS officer, or an IA&AS officer can spend his entire career in cities like Delhi, Mumbai, Hyderabad and Bangalore.
    The problem in IFS is that one could end up in countries where the opportunities are severely limited.

    I would say any of these situations are all workable. There would be a few difficult years for sure, but that is the norm in any situation where both are in generally successful careers. Even pvt sector guys who are in traveling jobs go through this. The key is to plan major personal decisions (when to start family, choice of posting and location etc) well in advance.
    Just an add, Asim- the MEA takes into account your spouse's career decisions and tries to work your posting around it. I have seen it in many cases.

    Otherwise, fully agree with you.


  • I am not going to be dragged in anymore in this unnecessary banter.. i am deeply sorry that you harbour this kind of feudalistic thoughts.. I really don't know what has induced so much bitterness in you... I can only hope u will be able to grow over it..
    This kind of mentality will hinder you and result in your social exclusion.. Because as you have seen from the above comments none of the guys support your view ...
    Rest up to you if you want to change it will be for your own good otherwise you will be excluded and cornered that's all ..
    Feudalistic...? Better see what type of society has been made by people of your mentality. In USA, 50% of marriages end up in divorce only because of your so called MODERN thoughts and blind women rights following trend.

    And regarding support, i don't need support of any particular number of people to prove my point. You are worried about support because your view is based on others thinking, tomorrow if majority says that we will call ADULTERY as boldness, you may even agree as you will be on side of majority.

    Social exclusion has been growing by the mentality advocated by you where family is secondary and individual greed is more important.

  • @all it feels great to read fellow aspirants reply to @Victor so nice to see such paradigm shift in way men view working women... More delightful is the way you all are standing up for a gender insensitive comment.. One thing is sure when you people crack the exam and enter the academy some positive changes will be induced in the way the world perceives women... Kudos to u all ^:)^ ^:)^ ^:)^
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