Writing a good Essay in UPSC Mains, Explained by Anudeep Durishetty Answer Writing Focus Group for Mains 2018 – Details DOWNLOAD: UPSC Prelims 2018 GS Paper I UPDATE : Answer Writing Group ( Offline | New Delhi ) Registrations Are Now Open! Community Meet 3 – June 10th | 2PM | Meet Anudeep, Abhishek, Sachin, Apurva and Ankita Mishra & the Toppers of CSE 2017

Forget me soon: Karnataka UPSC aspirant in suicide note

NEW DELHI: It was Varun Chandran’s fifth attempt at the Civil Services Examination. Coming from a small coastal village Karnataka, he had moved to Delhi five years ago. He shifted to Rajendra Nagar a year ago to save money and time taken to travel to the coaching institute.
Read also: Youth turned away from IAS exam for being late, ends life
But he was unfamiliar with the area his exam centre was located.


https://static.toiimg.com/photo/msid-64460139/64460139.jpg

https://m.timesofindia.com/city/delhi/forget-me-soon-so-that-i-may-rest-in-peace-his-last-message-to-kin/amp_articleshow/64458958.cms#amp_tf=From %1$s
«13

Comments

  • edited June 6
    Don't know why this thread still not getting the attention of the other members..I think this unfortunate event completely would hv avoided if the school authority allowed him to enter the exam hall,but the consequences of their rude approach is unpardonable equally also.Dont know what circumstances or in what kind society Varun Chandran belonged ,that underestimates failed UPSC aspirants while more than 99% students failed every year..don't know why society becomes so powerful to take decisions of others.. However I strongly believe that those people who expired their attempt or over aged after 5-6 attempts would be handy for any kind of job in India, because the kind preparation It demands really changes a man completely..
    So, with due all possible respects to our fellow Brother Varun ,I can't support his hasty decision to end his precious Life..
  • Don't know why this thread still not getting the attention of the other members..I think this unfortunate event completely would hv avoided if the school authority allowed him to enter the exam hall,but the consequences of their rude approach is unpardonable equally also.Dont know what circumstances or in what kind society Varun Chandran belonged ,that underestimates failed UPSC aspirants while more than 99% students failed every year..don't know why society becomes so powerful to take decisions of others.. However I strongly believe that those people who expired their attempt or over aged after 5-6 attempts would be handy for any kind of job in India, because the kind preparation It demands really changes a man completely..
    So, with due all possible respects to our fellow Brother Varun ,I can't support his hasty decision to end his precious Life..

    true bro..very true.. :(
  • Don't know why this thread still not getting the attention of the other members..I think this unfortunate event completely would hv avoided if the school authority allowed him to enter the exam hall,but the consequences of their rude approach is unpardonable equally also.Dont know what circumstances or in what kind society Varun Chandran belonged ,that underestimates failed UPSC aspirants while more than 99% students failed every year..don't know why society becomes so powerful to take decisions of others.. However I strongly believe that those people who expired their attempt or over aged after 5-6 attempts would be handy for any kind of job in India, because the kind preparation It demands really changes a man completely..
    So, with due all possible respects to our fellow Brother Varun ,I can't support his hasty decision to end his precious Life..

    its a huge tragedy. its undeniable that livable atmosphere in india is of very low quality. there is such enormous amount of societal pressure that even well meaning , sincere people collapse
  • We don’t know what happened to him after he was turned away from the Centre. We don’t know what he was going through before the exams, because lets face it, we are all under various kinds of stress and we deal with it differently. We don’t know what support he received and how he was counselled, given that he was heavily invested in the exam and lost the opportunity to even try his luck at the it. All of us may seem similar to each other in terms of goals we set and the obstacles we face, but that is just the surface of it. I don’t support his decision either. Nobody in their right mind would. But i also refuse to believe that he was not rational enough to understand the consequences of his act, or that he valued himself any less. Each one of us is invested in our dreams and goals. He was a sincere and hard working aspirant with a great spirit of sacrifice.

    We must understand that we are not rational beings who also feel emotions. We are primarily emotional beings and we rationalise our emotions. Most of the times we succeed in rationalising our emotions, but sometimes we are just not that strong. We may feel strong and confident at one moment, but quickly break down later in a manner we never expected would happen feeling helplessly powerless. Maybe he must have faced many hurdles before with upright strength, but when this completely unexpected and unfortunate incident happened with him, he sadly caved in. He needed help and support.

    It does not matter whether we as a society are too ambitious, or too judgemental. A society is the sum total of its human beings and it reflects their flaws. What bothers me that is that we as a society are not caring enough. It is not an unknown fact that every year board exams result come and many students commit suicide. Instead of being receptive to this reality, and being on the guard for our the students around us who are invested in these exams, we as a nation are still sleeping and slowly becoming numb to this reality.

    Everytime we hear some news of a student suicide, we may feel sad. But we don’t truly empathize. We feel that this person couldn't be us. We could never ever take such a decision for ourselves. We have perspective, this person didn’t. And with this attitude, suicides sadly continue. I believe what German Philosopher Martin Heidegger said, that life is finite, fragile and very temporary but we rarely appreciate its temporary presence. Because we like to think we are in control. But the reality is that we will all face situations of tremendous pressure, emotional investment and staggering steps. We are all strong. We are all also weak. And we need each other to root for ourselves and others. We need to be on guard and cautious.

    And when the dust settles, we need to reflect on the structural factors that affect all of us and may lead to helplessness and vulnerability. We need to break the ice in our conversations with our Friends so that help does not seem patronising, so that vulnerability may not be perceived as weakness, so that we may be able to internalise and meditate the narrative of kindness to the self, and steer ourselves through extreme emotions.
    "Muh mein rajnigandha, kadmon mein duniya!"
  • no where in world, do students take such drastic steps in such huge numbers due to pressure of " exam". these " exams" especially these 10, 12th exams are such low quality, non sensical rituals. we have people here getting 499 out of 500! 100/100 in English, physics, commerce, social studies etc. how can one get full marks in these subjects? if we have such geniuses here, why we lag behind so poorly academically and in everything
  • "Muh mein rajnigandha, kadmon mein duniya!"
  • krr said:

    no where in world, do students take such drastic steps in such huge numbers due to pressure of " exam". these " exams" especially these 10, 12th exams are such low quality, non sensical rituals. we have people here getting 499 out of 500! 100/100 in English, physics, commerce, social studies etc. how can one get full marks in these subjects? if we have such geniuses here, why we lag behind so poorly academically and in everything

    +1
  • shivajii said:

    NEW DELHI: It was Varun Chandran’s fifth attempt at the Civil Services Examination. Coming from a small coastal village Karnataka, he had moved to Delhi five years ago. He shifted to Rajendra Nagar a year ago to save money and time taken to travel to the coaching institute.
    Read also: Youth turned away from IAS exam for being late, ends life
    But he was unfamiliar with the area his exam centre was located.


    https://static.toiimg.com/photo/msid-64460139/64460139.jpg

    https://m.timesofindia.com/city/delhi/forget-me-soon-so-that-i-may-rest-in-peace-his-last-message-to-kin/amp_articleshow/64458958.cms#amp_tf=From %1$s

    Very sad incident. It reminds all that life much more than upsc. And not been able to clear it is not the end of life. Hope in future this rat race will end.
  • zazen said:

    We don’t know what happened to him after he was turned away from the Centre. We don’t know what he was going through before the exams, because lets face it, we are all under various kinds of stress and we deal with it differently. We don’t know what support he received and how he was counselled, given that he was heavily invested in the exam and lost the opportunity to even try his luck at the it. All of us may seem similar to each other in terms of goals we set and the obstacles we face, but that is just the surface of it. I don’t support his decision either. Nobody in their right mind would. But i also refuse to believe that he was not rational enough to understand the consequences of his act, or that he valued himself any less. Each one of us is invested in our dreams and goals. He was a sincere and hard working aspirant with a great spirit of sacrifice.

    We must understand that we are not rational beings who also feel emotions. We are primarily emotional beings and we rationalise our emotions. Most of the times we succeed in rationalising our emotions, but sometimes we are just not that strong. We may feel strong and confident at one moment, but quickly break down later in a manner we never expected would happen feeling helplessly powerless. Maybe he must have faced many hurdles before with upright strength, but when this completely unexpected and unfortunate incident happened with him, he sadly caved in. He needed help and support.

    It does not matter whether we as a society are too ambitious, or too judgemental. A society is the sum total of its human beings and it reflects their flaws. What bothers me that is that we as a society are not caring enough. It is not an unknown fact that every year board exams result come and many students commit suicide. Instead of being receptive to this reality, and being on the guard for our the students around us who are invested in these exams, we as a nation are still sleeping and slowly becoming numb to this reality.

    Everytime we hear some news of a student suicide, we may feel sad. But we don’t truly empathize. We feel that this person couldn't be us. We could never ever take such a decision for ourselves. We have perspective, this person didn’t. And with this attitude, suicides sadly continue. I believe what German Philosopher Martin Heidegger said, that life is finite, fragile and very temporary but we rarely appreciate its temporary presence. Because we like to think we are in control. But the reality is that we will all face situations of tremendous pressure, emotional investment and staggering steps. We are all strong. We are all also weak. And we need each other to root for ourselves and others. We need to be on guard and cautious.

    And when the dust settles, we need to reflect on the structural factors that affect all of us and may lead to helplessness and vulnerability. We need to break the ice in our conversations with our Friends so that help does not seem patronising, so that vulnerability may not be perceived as weakness, so that we may be able to internalise and meditate the narrative of kindness to the self, and steer ourselves through extreme emotions.

    Good message but people in center were doing duty and have no personal enmity. People in center are cooperative as far my exp is concerned until you are very late. That’s why it is recommended to visit your center one day in advance before actual day if you don’t know it’s whereabouts. Plus, lot of people attach too much importance to aura of what follows next after clearing exam and look down other jobs which in turn make them unemployed for a long time. As a result when reality struck you hard you are left with no options and emotional deregulation force you to surrender to your circumstances.
    Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.
  • UPSC explicitly mentioned that gates will be closed 10 minutes before. In his 5 the attempt he should have visited the centre a day before to avoid such rush. When you don't get sure about your centre through Google maps then you must visit before. Regarding cooperation at exam centre. Yes they were very cooperative. In my centre there were many discripencies in candidates admit card like it happend with a few that their names an admit card were not matching with their id proof. But they considered and allowed them to go for the exam asked them to get it corrected asap.

    The sucide committed by him underlines deep issue of mental health. We only know that he was denied entry and then committed sucide. This is not the reason and real picture. What he was going through no one knows. What he needed was care and support by his family/friends to go to psychiatrist. But in our society don't accept that one is mentally ill. Why do we? Because it is a taboo. Just like being a transgender.

    Learn the lessen everyone. If you find any fellow aspirants or anyone around you in distress then kindly ask him to seek psychiatric opinion. It will be very helpful to him/her and the people who care for them.

    This life is much more than failing/ passing in an exam. Not all who have been selected are happy and not all who failed are sad. Accept that.
    5th attempt
    Prelims score- 234/116/133/108/?
    Mains score-662/667/782/785
  • Burger said:

    zazen said:

    We don’t know what happened to him after he was turned away from the Centre. We don’t know what he was going through before the exams, because lets face it, we are all under various kinds of stress and we deal with it differently. We don’t know what support he received and how he was counselled, given that he was heavily invested in the exam and lost the opportunity to even try his luck at the it. All of us may seem similar to each other in terms of goals we set and the obstacles we face, but that is just the surface of it. I don’t support his decision either. Nobody in their right mind would. But i also refuse to believe that he was not rational enough to understand the consequences of his act, or that he valued himself any less. Each one of us is invested in our dreams and goals. He was a sincere and hard working aspirant with a great spirit of sacrifice.

    We must understand that we are not rational beings who also feel emotions. We are primarily emotional beings and we rationalise our emotions. Most of the times we succeed in rationalising our emotions, but sometimes we are just not that strong. We may feel strong and confident at one moment, but quickly break down later in a manner we never expected would happen feeling helplessly powerless. Maybe he must have faced many hurdles before with upright strength, but when this completely unexpected and unfortunate incident happened with him, he sadly caved in. He needed help and support.

    It does not matter whether we as a society are too ambitious, or too judgemental. A society is the sum total of its human beings and it reflects their flaws. What bothers me that is that we as a society are not caring enough. It is not an unknown fact that every year board exams result come and many students commit suicide. Instead of being receptive to this reality, and being on the guard for our the students around us who are invested in these exams, we as a nation are still sleeping and slowly becoming numb to this reality.

    Everytime we hear some news of a student suicide, we may feel sad. But we don’t truly empathize. We feel that this person couldn't be us. We could never ever take such a decision for ourselves. We have perspective, this person didn’t. And with this attitude, suicides sadly continue. I believe what German Philosopher Martin Heidegger said, that life is finite, fragile and very temporary but we rarely appreciate its temporary presence. Because we like to think we are in control. But the reality is that we will all face situations of tremendous pressure, emotional investment and staggering steps. We are all strong. We are all also weak. And we need each other to root for ourselves and others. We need to be on guard and cautious.

    And when the dust settles, we need to reflect on the structural factors that affect all of us and may lead to helplessness and vulnerability. We need to break the ice in our conversations with our Friends so that help does not seem patronising, so that vulnerability may not be perceived as weakness, so that we may be able to internalise and meditate the narrative of kindness to the self, and steer ourselves through extreme emotions.

    Good message but people in center were doing duty and have no personal enmity. People in center are cooperative as far my exp is concerned until you are very late. That’s why it is recommended to visit your center one day in advance before actual day if you don’t know it’s whereabouts. Plus, lot of people attach too much importance to aura of what follows next after clearing exam and look down other jobs which in turn make them unemployed for a long time. As a result when reality struck you hard you are left with no options and emotional deregulation force you to surrender to your circumstances.
    Yaar ye to ab ethics paper ki case study ban gayi hai. No right answers, only various approaches and scenarios to tick off. My approach is that rules should be made bearing in mind that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. Even last year at my centre, a guy came early and realised his exam is at a different school with the same name in the same area. He too turned pale and rushed to his destination. What can go wrong, will go wrong. Every year some or the person will the wrong bubble while filling the roll number or other particulars in the question paper. When so many students are attempting the exam, it is wise to be mindful of what course of action should be taken in case of such eventualities. Rules are rules. Nobody can argue with that. But sometimes mistakes are inherent in the structure of entropy, permutations and combinations, not in personal enemity. Moreover, i doubt if he was their own son, or relative or known then they still would not have allowed him to give the exam. No easy answers.
    "Muh mein rajnigandha, kadmon mein duniya!"
  • Now you can speak or preach anything and everything, but the truth is that a family lost his diamond. What I have learnt about upsc is that not all hardworking people get through it. You dont know what life holds for you 10 years from now. Passion and madness are needed for upsc but they shouldnt hinder in you in seeing life beyound upsc.
  • This year my cousin sister got only 72 percent in 10th c.bse board. Whole family relative is behaving like she has committed some crime.

    She is kinda fashionable.Everyone is blaming her ki sirf enhi me rehti hai.

    My one uncle whos son is in psu through gate and daughter in medical coaching faculty. He is the reason for my mental problems.now my cousin sis is also suffering coz of his taunts.

    He thinks his son in psu n daughter in coaching made him proud. Both of them topped in school in 10 n 12.

    Yaar Mai toh Phir bhi thoda mature Ho. Wo 10th ki ladki ke personality par kya aasar aayega?

    Is 10th so important??

    Everytime that guy will tell me. Take any job even for 20 K. Morale of employed person is something diffrent.

    Yaar ni Karna mujhe job. I will take Civil services till 26.(Now m 22 officially n 23 in real)

    God please give me n my all cousins strength to tackle.
    Astrology ,stand up comedy
    Love to make memes,
  • edited June 6
    I don't know why people give so much stress to UPSC and its services and make their lives dependent on it. While SDM and DSP in state services are clearly better than everything else apart from IAS/IPS and IFS, that UPSC offers. Especially for those who rant the argument that they want to join these services to "serve the society".

    In state service the competition is relatively less (compared to UPSC), age limits are much higher and unlimited number of attempts are there. I'm 22 years old, completed B.Tech last month only from a very reputed govt. college (NIRF rank<25). But I've consciously decided to appear for state PCS with full prep alongwith UPSC. And if I crack state PCS with SDM/DSP, it's the end of road for me.. I'll hang up my boots for good...

    To be honest, anyone who has seen a Deputy Collector or Deputy SP in action, especially in non-metro cities, will forget anything UPSC offers below IAS/IPS/IFS.
    I didn't choose the skuxx life, the skuxx life chose me...
  • I don't know why people give so much stress to UPSC and its services and make their lives dependent on it. While SDM and DSP in state services are clearly better than everything else apart from IAS/IPS and IFS, that UPSC offers. Especially for those who rant the argument that they want to join these services to "serve the society".

    In state service the competition is relatively less (compared to UPSC), age limits are much higher and unlimited number of attempts are there. I'm 22 years old, completed B.Tech last month only from a very reputed govt. college (NIRF rank<25), but I've consciously decided to appear for state PCS with full prep alongwith UPSC. And if I crack state PCS with SDM/DSP, it's the end of road for me.. I'll hang up my boots for good...

    To be honest, anyone who has seen a Deputy Collector or Deputy SP in action, especially in non-metro cities, will forget anything UPSC offers below IAS/IPS/IFS.</p>

    +1
  • This year my cousin sister got only 72 percent in 10th c.bse board. Whole family relative is behaving like she has committed some crime.

    She is kinda fashionable.Everyone is blaming her ki sirf enhi me rehti hai.

    My one uncle whos son is in psu through gate and daughter in medical coaching faculty. He is the reason for my mental problems.now my cousin sis is also suffering coz of his taunts.

    He thinks his son in psu n daughter in coaching made him proud. Both of them topped in school in 10 n 12.

    Yaar Mai toh Phir bhi thoda mature Ho. Wo 10th ki ladki ke personality par kya aasar aayega?

    Is 10th so important??

    Everytime that guy will tell me. Take any job even for 20 K. Morale of employed person is something diffrent.

    Yaar ni Karna mujhe job. I will take Civil services till 26.(Now m 22 officially n 23 in real)

    God please give me n my all cousins strength to tackle.

    No one can give you mental strength. Just remember the sacrifices of your parents nd focus on what mattes. Dont bother with these useless people. If you have money issues, get a job. Otherwise focus as per your plan. Your cousin will have a hard time but she has to prove herself after this to finish these taunts. That is how it is. Society wont change. She has to do what is in her best interest irrrespective of them.
  • Its too sad . Feeling sorry for the family and close ones
    asli pehalwan ki pehchan akhaade me nahi jindaggi me hove hai
    Taki jab jindaggi tumhe utha k pattak pattak k maar giraye
    To koi aisa daav khelo ki jindaggani chit hojave.
  • Sparrowin said:

    UPSC explicitly mentioned that gates will be closed 10 minutes before. In his 5 the attempt he should have visited the centre a day before to avoid such rush. When you don't get sure about your centre through Google maps then you must visit before. Regarding cooperation at exam centre. Yes they were very cooperative. In my centre there were many discripencies in candidates admit card like it happend with a few that their names an admit card were not matching with their id proof. But they considered and allowed them to go for the exam asked them to get it corrected asap.

    The sucide committed by him underlines deep issue of mental health. We only know that he was denied entry and then committed sucide. This is not the reason and real picture. What he was going through no one knows. What he needed was care and support by his family/friends to go to psychiatrist. But in our society don't accept that one is mentally ill. Why do we? Because it is a taboo. Just like being a transgender.

    Learn the lessen everyone. If you find any fellow aspirants or anyone around you in distress then kindly ask him to seek psychiatric opinion. It will be very helpful to him/her and the people who care for them.

    This life is much more than failing/ passing in an exam. Not all who have been selected are happy and not all who failed are sad. Accept that.

    I second this. It is the onus of the student to follow procedure. Clearly he was mentally disturbed and needed help. Going back to his room and being alone just made it worse. I cant imagine the hell his parents are going through. I have seen candidates turned away in other entrance exams too but they didnt do something so drastic.
  • another suicide in rajenra nagar block 4
  • edited June 6

    another suicide in rajenra nagar block 4

    Bhaii imo it will have further @domino effects needs to stopped somewhere.

    Yar i was thinking he might be in his 6th attempt and of 32 years :/ but how come he took such drastic step.
    Imo he was already in some mental chaos as he reached the center pretty late or who knows he might have planned to do this on the date much earlier itself.

    So recently a chief secretary of a state lost about10 lakhs through fraudulent transections. :o how? Well through same old method of threatening on phone and asking otp :o its hard to believe particularly when this news never went public :) .

    Just because of a sub-inspector both sp and dm were suspended as the local public and local police were in ardent support of him.

    When an officers ward do not perform in consonance to his desires the officer doesnt hesitate to almost disown them :smile:

    Irrespective of all this cse is beyond to remain most cherished mission of millions of youth.But whenever someone feels low or failed must remember Gandhiji ka jantar where he asks to look below to feel up :smile:

    And yes plzzz change this ferzi perception about cs and

    Bloom where planted :blush:

    Atb everyone :smile:
  • edited June 6
    Sometimes I feel dispragingly about me as having developed a thick skin. Itne ghatiya performance ek ke baad ek main detaa aaya hun - naa sirf upsc but in other exams as well. Pr iss sab ke baad bhi jaise kuchh fark hee naheen pdta. Iss saal bhi getting a score of somewhere in early 90s. I know my condition, andar se bura lg rha hai. But overtally I am able to keep calm - not as a show off, but even to me I can pose that it's ok. Dekh lenge. Perhaps this is how a thick skin works. Perhaps the person had gone thru this phase, who knows for me as well the pain would someday break thru my thickness. But ek baat pakki hai - iss preparation mein thick skin hona jaroori hai. Mujhe achha naheen lg rha ki main updesh sa de raha hun. Pr duniyaadaari ke paar apna ek personal world har koi banaata hai. Ye bhi tootata dikhta hai, to shayad sambhalna mushkil ho jaata hai. To in dono ko jitna ek doosre se alag rakha jae, jeena utna aasaan ho sakta hai. Wo apna personal space, jismein aap apni duniya ko parikalpit karein - to have a goal beyond the mainstream goals - these should stand on their own strength and not derive their life from the banal worldy affairs of becoming IAS or CEO, having a settled life etc. Sabko primarily uss personal space ko build karn chahiye. Summarily, we should be true to our desires - that's teh starting point in knowing and building yourself. Worldiness should only be a secondary feature of our personality.

    I think I have already said things bigger than the size of my mouth.

    It takes a moment to end a life, and billion ones to build one. We live in such a big world that there is always a person who would be in a situation worse than you. Look at your own composition - so many cells in your body working efficiently 24x7 to keep you healthy. Being alive is a miracle. Don't end that magic.
  • Sometimes I feel dispragingly about me as having developed a thick skin. Itne ghatiya performance ek ke baad ek main detaa aaya hun - naa sirf upsc but in other exams as well. Pr iss sab ke baad bhi jaise kuchh fark hee naheen pdta. Iss saal bhi getting a score of somewhere in early 90s. I know my condition, andar se bura lg rha hai. But overtally I am able to keep calm - not as a show off, but even to me I can pose that it's ok. Dekh lenge. Perhaps this is how a thick skin works. Perhaps the person had gone thru this phase, who knows for me as well the pain would someday break thru my thickness. But ek baat pakki hai - iss preparation mein thick skin hona jaroori hai. Mujhe achha naheen lg rha ki main updesh sa de raha hun. Pr duniyaadaari ke paar apna ek personal world har koi banaata hai. Ye bhi tootata dikhta hai, to shayad sambhalna mushkil ho jaata hai. To in dono ko jitna ek doosre se alag rakha jae, jeena utna aasaan ho sakta hai. Wo apna personal space, jismein aap apni duniya ko parikalpit karein - to have a goal beyond the mainstream goals - these should stand on their own strength and not derive their life from the banal worldy affairs of becoming IAS or CEO, having a settled life etc. Sabko primarily uss personal space ko build karn chahiye. Summarily, we should be true to our desires - that's teh starting point in knowing and building yourself. Worldiness should only be a secondary feature of our personality.

    I think I have already said things bigger than the size of my mouth.

    It takes a moment to end a life, and billion ones to build one. We live in such a big world that there is always a person who would be in a situation worse than you. Look at your own composition - so many cells in your body working 24x7 to keep you healthy. Being alive is a miracle. Don't end that magic.

    bhut shilikha he bhai
    kuch na kuch toh sbka ho jata he, life end krne se kya milega..bn jayenge chaprasi agr kuch nhi hua toh, compromise kr lenge apne ego se
    "Is it surprising that prisons resemble factories, schools, barracks, hospitals, which all resemble prisons?"
  • edited June 6
    Lt_Mamiya said:

    Sometimes I feel dispragingly about me as having developed a thick skin. Itne ghatiya performance ek ke baad ek main detaa aaya hun - naa sirf upsc but in other exams as well. Pr iss sab ke baad bhi jaise kuchh fark hee naheen pdta. Iss saal bhi getting a score of somewhere in early 90s. I know my condition, andar se bura lg rha hai. But overtally I am able to keep calm - not as a show off, but even to me I can pose that it's ok. Dekh lenge. Perhaps this is how a thick skin works. Perhaps the person had gone thru this phase, who knows for me as well the pain would someday break thru my thickness. But ek baat pakki hai - iss preparation mein thick skin hona jaroori hai. Mujhe achha naheen lg rha ki main updesh sa de raha hun. Pr duniyaadaari ke paar apna ek personal world har koi banaata hai. Ye bhi tootata dikhta hai, to shayad sambhalna mushkil ho jaata hai. To in dono ko jitna ek doosre se alag rakha jae, jeena utna aasaan ho sakta hai. Wo apna personal space, jismein aap apni duniya ko parikalpit karein - to have a goal beyond the mainstream goals - these should stand on their own strength and not derive their life from the banal worldy affairs of becoming IAS or CEO, having a settled life etc. Sabko primarily uss personal space ko build karn chahiye. Summarily, we should be true to our desires - that's teh starting point in knowing and building yourself. Worldiness should only be a secondary feature of our personality.

    I think I have already said things bigger than the size of my mouth.

    It takes a moment to end a life, and billion ones to build one. We live in such a big world that there is always a person who would be in a situation worse than you. Look at your own composition - so many cells in your body working 24x7 to keep you healthy. Being alive is a miracle. Don't end that magic.

    bhut shilikha he bhai
    kuch na kuch toh sbka ho jata he, life end krne se kya milega..bn jayenge chaprasi agr kuch nhi hua toh, compromise kr lenge apne ego se
    not necessary that one has to compromise his/her ego. But that sense of 'me' or 'I' should not depend only on being chaprasi/IAS/whatever-job-and-status. A person is more tha that, a lot more that. I know society doesn't support a status-agnostic identity. It's a difficult thing to do. And thus needs life-long investment in self, starting from childhood - the earlier you start this investment, the better and sturdier the personality that would develop.
  • edited June 6

    Sometimes I feel dispragingly about me as having developed a thick skin. Itne ghatiya performance ek ke baad ek main detaa aaya hun - naa sirf upsc but in other exams as well. Pr iss sab ke baad bhi jaise kuchh fark hee naheen pdta. Iss saal bhi getting a score of somewhere in early 90s. I know my condition, andar se bura lg rha hai. But overtally I am able to keep calm - not as a show off, but even to me I can pose that it's ok. Dekh lenge. Perhaps this is how a thick skin works. Perhaps the person had gone thru this phase, who knows for me as well the pain would someday break thru my thickness. But ek baat pakki hai - iss preparation mein thick skin hona jaroori hai. Mujhe achha naheen lg rha ki main updesh sa de raha hun. Pr duniyaadaari ke paar apna ek personal world har koi banaata hai. Ye bhi tootata dikhta hai, to shayad sambhalna mushkil ho jaata hai. To in dono ko jitna ek doosre se alag rakha jae, jeena utna aasaan ho sakta hai. Wo apna personal space, jismein aap apni duniya ko parikalpit karein - to have a goal beyond the mainstream goals - these should stand on their own strength and not derive their life from the banal worldy affairs of becoming IAS or CEO, having a settled life etc. Sabko primarily uss personal space ko build karn chahiye. Summarily, we should be true to our desires - that's teh starting point in knowing and building yourself. Worldiness should only be a secondary feature of our personality.

    I think I have already said things bigger than the size of my mouth.

    It takes a moment to end a life, and billion ones to build one. We live in such a big world that there is always a person who would be in a situation worse than you. Look at your own composition - so many cells in your body working efficiently 24x7 to keep you healthy. Being alive is a miracle. Don't end that magic.

    UPSC ain't for Faint Hearted , Said My College Senior Who Made it to 2015 IAS Batch in his maiden attempt . I Know Sir , I am prepared for any situation , a confident me replied . 2 Years down the line I realised how true he was when he said this . But I will make it to LBSNAA FC .
  • :( :'( :'( :'( :'(
    Nature & Solitude lover.....
  • krrkrr
    edited June 6
    .
  • edited June 6
    Whatever he has done is really sad especially for those left behind. The successive failures in UPSC exams that we all face at various stages require regular counselling sessions from family, loved ones or maybe professionals.
  • edited June 6
    UPSC and Civil services are like shaadi ke laado jisse milta hai woh bhi rota jisse nahi milta hai woh bhi

    Couple of pointers
    1. We overestimate power of officers. In reality they are lakheer ke fakheer. Follow the rule book else u r screwed. Speak to any senior IAS officer.
    2. We also overestimate respect for services. AIS and IFS ka respect baki are just called allied services
    3. We assume UPSC selection is all hard work. Any candidate who has appeared in UPSC interview knows UPSC is black box. You never know the guy who thinks he will be on border line becomes IAS in first attempt in UR
    4. IAS/ IPS are just a service ab toh pension bhi nahi hai.
    5. IPS itna jannat hoti toh Safer Karim cheating nahi karta. If IAS was Paradise Baxaurs DM won't have commited suicide and Roman Saini won't have quit the service

  • UPSC and Civil services are like shaadi ke laado jisse milta hai woh bhi rota jisse nahi milta hai woh bhi

    Couple of pointers
    1. We overestimate power of officers. In reality they are lakheer ke fakheer. Follow the rule book else u r screwed. Speak to any senior IAS officer.
    2. We also overestimate respect for services. AIS and IFS ka respect baki are just called allied services
    3. We assume UPSC selection is all hard work. Any candidate who has appeared in UPSC interview knows UPSC is black box. You never know the guy who thinks he will be on border line becomes IAS in first attempt in UR
    4. IAS/ IPS are just a service ab toh pension bhi nahi hai.
    5. IPS itna jannat hoti toh Safer Karim cheating nahi karta. If IAS was Paradise Baxaurs DM won't have commited suicide and Roman Saini won't have quit the service

    good points. at the end, civil services can be called a good job profile. nothing less nothing more
Sign In or Join to comment.

Courses by ForumIAS for CSE
ForumIAS is trusted by over 10,000+ students for their Prelims, Mains and Interview Preparation and we currently run several assistance programs to help students from Civil Services prelims preparation to rank upgradation to IAS. You can enroll for these programs by visiting http://academy.forumias.com

Welcome!

We are a secret self-moderated community for Civil Services preparation. Feel free to join, start a discussion, answer a question or just to say Thank you.

Just dont spread the word ;)

Sign in or join with Facebook or Google

Subscribe to ForumIAS Blog