How to kill boredom, depression, fear and uncertainty while living alone and preparing

doctor_zero

I live alone , thousands of kms away from home and delhi. I have no friends here. I spend most of my time studying and keep myself busy. But sometimes i desperately feel the need of some human connection in my life. Not to talk or to roam around. I miss presence of upsc aspirants nearby . Someone with whom i can discuss my strategies, my studies, test marks , weak points etc...i want to know how people not living in delhi fill up.this void. Or is it only me who is missing some motivation n competition . It may sound lame.
I lived in delhi for 2 years and it was energising. I had friends . We used to discuss loads of stuffs. It made preparation a fun and focused experience. It helped me clearing prelims n mains in first shot. Then i had to drop preparation for 1yr. Some of my friends are selected n others have parted from upsc. I m preparing on my own . Sometimes it becomes very monotonous exercise. Clouds of boredom and depression engulf me. I cant afford to go to delhi now.
Need suggestions...how to overcome this feeling. How to instill sone energy competition n motivation. How to fill d vacuum.

forward

I also felt the same as I am in exact same situation. I found that looking for solutions through online media, wts app groups etc did not catch my spirit. But I always had a couple of good friends to talk to over phone. But that used to be for very short duration each day, say 10 minutes. What really helped me was solving mains questions esp ethics questions by actually writing and practising them. Rewriting, rethinking. Closely observing the shortfalls in my thought and attention in grasping the essence of question. Trying out best way in which the said question could he amswered with minimal words. Keeping a check on handwriting quality and speed, use of tables in answers, trying out new pens that could help best.
It took me a weak to solve 2015 ethics paper. But totally enjoyed it and got back on track in the process.

cromagnan

same problem here. It happens especially during the morning time

om_70345

You can seek your inner peace by talking to your beloved family member and helping them in their work during your extra time (after your study time).As this is a bliss in disguise to be with your family and prepare for the examination. Practice Yoga in the morning and listen to your favourite music in evening.Hope this may help u.

doctor_zero

@forward @om_70345 thanks alot for your suggestions. To vent out my loneliness and frustration i was writing previous years essays.it helped. Wrote 2 essays.
I go to gym for adrenaline rush. I il start practising yoga. But the thing is this feeling creeps in occasionally no matter what i do.

doctor_zero

same problem here. It happens especially during the morning time

Yaa ...if i overcome dis , day is great. If i sulk in ; a day is in gutter. Wish i had some friends who were preparing with me .

forward

Don't speak of it a lot.

calypso

@doctor_zero : hey!! been thru that a LOT!!
I have wasted two years of precious time just feeling depressed and nothing else. That phase was the worst.


wat I tried ---

Find a small task and immediate appreciation for that.
If you have a job, be among ppl. waste your time for a while. its okay...
Try and work on ur hobbies seriously.
work hard. physical and mental. dont give yourself time to think abt ur depression or anything. only get the wrk done
wen the day is packed and rushed and busy with ur schedule,end of the day, u dont have time to think abt anything.

This isnt my wisdom completely.. I have read it in one of Dale carnegie's self help books, in which he describes how a mother who lost her 25 year old son in the Iraq war ( he was a soldier and fighting the war) engulfed in grief, has come out of her grief and lonliness. She got a day job at some hotel or sth and worked all day and wen she reaches home, she has no time to think of anything.

based on this, I tried coming out of depression, it was very difficult not to think negatively, but I think its worth a shot.
I wonder, how does the lion live all alone? :P

I hope you find your peace

P.S: forum is a good place to keep urself engaged. seek and thou shall find

GentleGiant6

@forward @om_70345 thanks alot for your suggestions. To vent out my loneliness and frustration i was writing previous years essays.it helped. Wrote 2 essays.
I go to gym for adrenaline rush. I il start practising yoga. But the thing is this feeling creeps in occasionally no matter what i do.

Be careful.Coupled with exam stress it can lead to depression.

Make sure whatever you do , do not stop doing

A) Things you like to do.
E.x gym , hobbies , eating out.

B)Analysis of your study productivity.Such thoughts have a tendency to slow you down

C)Unaccounted tiredness or feeling of mental exhaustion.

Solutions.

Find a purpose.Let that purpose motivate you. Whenever you lust for company remember the sacrifice you are making for that goal.

Playing a team sport instead of going to the gym.It ll keep you healthy .There will be people to talk to.

E.x playing football involves some coordination.

Talking to your self.Not in a crazy way
I am talking mental conditioning.
E.x
You can do what Dwayne Johnson does when he is distracted by his thoughts in the gym.

"Looks away and shouts "Focus!" to bring his attention to task at hand.
What many great sportspersons do when they are losing the match.

Problem is company seeking can be distracting and due to exam pressure one tends to drift towards procrastination and time wastage.

Having an e-chat with family and friends helps.Make sure you dont talk about UPSC prep but other sides of life.Watching stand up comedy may also help you.

Best of luck.Stay strong.

Source- Prepped in isolation for two years.Everytime I reached a month before pre I started getting depressive thoughts and skipped it.Dont be like me.Be like the Rock !

tyrion_the_imp

you can still visit xvideos using a vpn..

G_RAWSTAR0410

Same condition for me ..
Depressed state , no motivation and no energy to do any task.I felt everything negative and tiersome
However I tried some new activities like GYM, new hobbies , new music, writing answers and be in contact with family as much as possible.