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Virtual communities sometime become place of solace and peace in times of failure. After reading so many heart wrenching stories, I consider my life to be much fortunate than what I considered earlier.
this was my 3 rd prelims and had written 2 mains earlier. I was so much confident that I took 2.5 months of leaves already from my organization and shifted to my friend's house who were all preparing for CSE but to my utter dismay, I cdnt clear prelims this time. I m nearing 30 and have attempts but dont know what to do. I have always prepared CSE wile working so, thinking that part time preparation might have been reason for my failures but now, taking a risk of full time preparation is too much.
I m in a dilemma and road ahead is pretty unclear. whether to go ahead and get into other frontiers like startups or should I give my last and serious attempt but somebody has wisely said that attaching too emotion to UPSC is sometime suicidal and everybody should now his/her time to take a respectful exit as UPSC is just another job but not THE life.. In the meantime, thinking about any good excuse to be told to my boss so that I can resume my office next week.
Certain quotes doesn't have an independent existence of their own. They make sense only under the right context. So when someone says, "Never give up" analyze it over the ground realities and then make a pragmatic decision. "Insanity is the act of doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result".
Those who are feeling dejected….should first kick out the fear or society out of your head…this we must understand ASAP that we are not living for society but for us.
When I started preparation I was already ""12 years down the lane"" after graduation (I finished undergrad in 2001, got this chance due to OBC and more relaxed age policy of recent years). First Mains 2013 , second in 2014…..both times Failed with "flying colors"…..On ""April 12th"" 2015 (mains 2014 result was out) life looked blank…after 6 cans of beer I shoot 6 emails with attached CV for postdoctoral positions in US and Europe…4 days later…One positive call from US….joining date 15 sept 2015. On Aug 24th, I felt like I have done enough to write mains one last time…so rejected the US call (they did not agree to postpone)….come Oct 12th after cutting the Bday cake my roommate called (I thought It was for Bday wishes that f***** was late as usual ) from karol bagh…Pre result is out….""so was I"" from the Mains Race….again time for 6 beers …..this time I had to finish them before midnight …bcz navratre sure hone wale the and my roommate did not want to take risk for mains-2015 ( he was through pre)…I thought I can cry after having beers….instead I shoot again 4 emails….today I am writing this msg after getting one positive call…. Moral of the story ""pal pal badalti hai roop jindgi"..no body can console you except yourself…..people say I have one more chance ( I am 34, OBC)..I said ""Na baba na"" enough adventure…time to sleep on the bed again…for last one year and half sleeping on the floor so that ""subah bina alarm ke aankh khool jaye""……daddy is sad and mumma said ""ab tu mere pass rah 2-4 mahine ghee-doodh kha ""sale IAS ne mera Chora sukhha diya"……though in reality I have gained weight due to long seatings ……Ek kashish dil mai hai aur shayad hamesha rahe….But aid akaun hai jisko wo sub kuch mila ho jo unhone chaaha ho….I am back from Delhi ajj butter and chutney ka mjaa liya….This sunday going to Haridwar with parents…7 days tour..
@pars sagar kudos bro. I am going there too this Saturday! Milenge aapse ghaat kinare.
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this was my 3 rd prelims and had written 2 mains earlier. I was so much confident that I took 2.5 months of leaves already from my organization and shifted to my friend's house who were all preparing for CSE but to my utter dismay, I cdnt clear prelims this time. I m nearing 30 and have attempts but dont know what to do. I have always prepared CSE wile working so, thinking that part time preparation might have been reason for my failures but now, taking a risk of full time preparation is too much.
I m in a dilemma and road ahead is pretty unclear. whether to go ahead and get into other frontiers like startups or should I give my last and serious attempt but somebody has wisely said that attaching too emotion to UPSC is sometime suicidal and everybody should now his/her time to take a respectful exit as UPSC is just another job but not THE life..
In the meantime, thinking about any good excuse to be told to my boss so that I can resume my office next week.