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Marital rape a reality or propaganda?

edited October 2015 in Current Affairs
Recently, it was in news.
If yes, can court and law solve the problem or social counselling will be better?
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Comments

  • Feminist are saying it's reality... sarkar saying it's propaganda, for breaking family...
    It's hard to say...since upsc like feminist view, i will go with that.. :-/
    I vow to win.... !!!
  • If u marry a girl it does not give right to sex whenever you want irrespective of her consensus so marital rape is dark reality in several marriages where women are forced to have sex ,and even several developed countries have laws regarding it and its high time we in India formulate a law but under this PATRIARCHAL RSS RULE chances are slim
  • It is very much a reality. What is rape? It is forceful sexual intercourse by someone against the will of the other.

    Now add these things up.

    1. Most marriages in India are arranged.
    2. In most marriages, women has no power or say. The fact that they pay dowry to get married tells you about the difference in power.
    3. Traditionally, sex happens during the first night.
    4. Women are expected to be virgins.


    It is often said that a women begins her married life with a rape. It is true in most of rural India, or in cases where the husband is a misogynist.


    There is another problem, i.e. how can you prove that the statement of the victim is a lie or the truth? As medical evidence cannot be used.

    Maybe, the only solution is divorce, and treat it as terms for divorce.

    But the real solution is women empowerment and employment, so that they are not economically dependent on the husband, and marry a partner of their choice, and are not afraid to leave the marriage in case of abuse.
    CSE 2015. Got in.

    CSE 2016. Hopefully, the hallowed All India Services.
  • Get Govt. into Bedrooms also. :-q
    previously it was dowry, 498 A now get another story of Marital Rape to harass men.
  • Argument that a law can be misused so there should be no law is a self defeating .And raise above narrow identities of sex,caste,creed,race,nationality rather protecting the innocent and justice should be our concern
  • But even in divorce it will be need to be proved.
    Morever, when women will want to have divorce even when she will be at fault can allege rape.
    Just taking hypothetical case

    After marriage, if girl has affair and she wants divorce with alimony.
    She can allege rape. Even if sex happened consensual.
    It is very much a reality. What is rape? It is forceful sexual intercourse by someone against the will of the other.

    Now add these things up.

    1. Most marriages in India are arranged.
    2. In most marriages, women has no power or say. The fact that they pay dowry to get married tells you about the difference in power.
    3. Traditionally, sex happens during the first night.
    4. Women are expected to be virgins.


    It is often said that a women begins her married life with a rape. It is true in most of rural India, or in cases where the husband is a misogynist.


    There is another problem, i.e. how can you prove that the statement of the victim is a lie or the truth? As medical evidence cannot be used.

    Maybe, the only solution is divorce, and treat it as terms for divorce.

    But the real solution is women empowerment and employment, so that they are not economically dependent on the husband, and marry a partner of their choice, and are not afraid to leave the marriage in case of abuse.
  • :-O yeh ek aur barood chupaya hua tha tumne? Himalaya Singh? :-O =))
  • :-O yeh ek aur barood chupaya hua tha tumne? Himalaya Singh? :-O =))
    +1
  • Argument that a law can be misused so there should be no law is a self defeating .And raise above narrow identities of sex,caste,creed,race,nationality rather protecting the innocent and justice should be our concern
    I differ. Reality is that laws are misused. Law can be there but penalty for misusing should be same as penalty for marital rape.

    Not like in recent false rape case, complainant fined rs. 500 and punishment to standing few hour in court.

  • :-O yeh ek aur barood chupaya hua tha tumne? Himalaya Singh? :-O =))
    :-S
  • punishment for misuse of law is an entirely different topic then whether a crime should be criminalised or not..
    In both cases, punishment should be adequate.
  • But even in divorce it will be need to be proved.
    Morever, when women will want to have divorce even when she will be at fault can allege rape.
    Just taking hypothetical case

    After marriage, if girl has affair and she wants divorce with alimony.
    She can allege rape. Even if sex happened consensual.
    It is very much a reality. What is rape? It is forceful sexual intercourse by someone against the will of the other.

    Now add these things up.

    1. Most marriages in India are arranged.
    2. In most marriages, women has no power or say. The fact that they pay dowry to get married tells you about the difference in power.
    3. Traditionally, sex happens during the first night.
    4. Women are expected to be virgins.


    It is often said that a women begins her married life with a rape. It is true in most of rural India, or in cases where the husband is a misogynist.


    There is another problem, i.e. how can you prove that the statement of the victim is a lie or the truth? As medical evidence cannot be used.

    Maybe, the only solution is divorce, and treat it as terms for divorce.

    But the real solution is women empowerment and employment, so that they are not economically dependent on the husband, and marry a partner of their choice, and are not afraid to leave the marriage in case of abuse.
    If a girl wants divorce, noone can stop her. She will find one way or the other. Be it rape, dowry, anything. So, you cant win here.

    You will have to pay alimony in any case. What i proposed was no additional case separately for marital rape. Just end it with divorce. Alimony is going to happen rape or no rape.
    CSE 2015. Got in.

    CSE 2016. Hopefully, the hallowed All India Services.
  • But even in divorce it will be need to be proved.
    Morever, when women will want to have divorce even when she will be at fault can allege rape.
    Just taking hypothetical case

    After marriage, if girl has affair and she wants divorce with alimony.
    She can allege rape. Even if sex happened consensual.
    It is very much a reality. What is rape? It is forceful sexual intercourse by someone against the will of the other.

    Now add these things up.

    1. Most marriages in India are arranged.
    2. In most marriages, women has no power or say. The fact that they pay dowry to get married tells you about the difference in power.
    3. Traditionally, sex happens during the first night.
    4. Women are expected to be virgins.


    It is often said that a women begins her married life with a rape. It is true in most of rural India, or in cases where the husband is a misogynist.


    There is another problem, i.e. how can you prove that the statement of the victim is a lie or the truth? As medical evidence cannot be used.

    Maybe, the only solution is divorce, and treat it as terms for divorce.

    But the real solution is women empowerment and employment, so that they are not economically dependent on the husband, and marry a partner of their choice, and are not afraid to leave the marriage in case of abuse.
    If a girl wants divorce, noone can stop her. She will find one way or the other. Be it rape, dowry, anything. So, you cant win here.

    You will have to pay alimony in any case. What i proposed was no additional case separately for marital rape. Just end it with divorce. Alimony is going to happen rape or no rape.
    So..tjis is injustice to a man..
    I vow to win.... !!!
  • Thats true.
    However, alimony is not given when girl herself at fault like adultary.
    If marital rape is ground then she can allege to get alimony.

    But i get you, she can anyway use other laws.
    But even in divorce it will be need to be proved.
    Morever, when women will want to have divorce even when she will be at fault can allege rape.
    Just taking hypothetical case

    After marriage, if girl has affair and she wants divorce with alimony.
    She can allege rape. Even if sex happened consensual.
    It is very much a reality. What is rape? It is forceful sexual intercourse by someone against the will of the other.

    Now add these things up.

    1. Most marriages in India are arranged.
    2. In most marriages, women has no power or say. The fact that they pay dowry to get married tells you about the difference in power.
    3. Traditionally, sex happens during the first night.
    4. Women are expected to be virgins.


    It is often said that a women begins her married life with a rape. It is true in most of rural India, or in cases where the husband is a misogynist.


    There is another problem, i.e. how can you prove that the statement of the victim is a lie or the truth? As medical evidence cannot be used.

    Maybe, the only solution is divorce, and treat it as terms for divorce.

    But the real solution is women empowerment and employment, so that they are not economically dependent on the husband, and marry a partner of their choice, and are not afraid to leave the marriage in case of abuse.
    If a girl wants divorce, noone can stop her. She will find one way or the other. Be it rape, dowry, anything. So, you cant win here.

    You will have to pay alimony in any case. What i proposed was no additional case separately for marital rape. Just end it with divorce. Alimony is going to happen rape or no rape.
  • Anyways...
    Marital rape is a reality. Fact that a rape is rape is not the case in india . if you have married the girl you are legally given the ticket to coerce her to have sex with you even when she don't want. I.e. when she is openly saying she don't want.
    There are so many girls who get married at minor ages and please don't tell me they wanted to have sex..
    Many a times they keep quiet and think its their duty to fulfill the whims n fantasies of their partner as this is what they are for.. To serve.
    There are a many cases when a woman suffers n suffers only to be told by the court that it wasn't rape. And the woman can only take divorce.. Or at most get charges of assault n beating which are NOT same as rape. If something like this happens to a family member em sorry but I would be aghast at the failure of the system to call a rape a rape and guilty to be punished according to the crime...

    Having said this... Its a very difficult thing to decide when they lady is giving her consent when not. Law could easily and very easily be misused because no body knows what exactly was the situation in the bed room. So how can court or other people decide. Woman can blame get bruises made up .. Will that be justified as rape..coz nobody saw it. So just like that the genuine cases won't get the due attention and lot of machinery will be spending time n energy fighting for those many who put false charges.


    Plus the fact that divorces will increase isn't true.. Jinko divorce Lena hai vo le he lenge.. Man or woman both..

    My final call-- what about the genuine case?? The girl who was actually raped , coerced ??
    What about her! Many laws can be misused and we can have proper rules made up to avoid its misuse.. I think a girl who is raped can be easily identified from those who made it up.. We are even now seeing many cases where false rape charges are put and they are caught! So same will be done.
    And as far as taking bed room to court is concerned when the man who raped didn't cared before rapeing should the woman care?? In the other case when the man is innocent... I think if a woman is falsely charging him of rape, they are already at the level where family is already broken.And the rape charge can be investigated properly. So this law will break families is nothing but a stupid concept.
  • edited September 2015
    Amazing insight of ppl... if a married man coerce his wife for sex it's rape..but when a married woman coerc her husband for sex then there is no word for it...
    I vow to win.... !!!
  • Anyways...
    Marital rape is a reality. Fact that a rape is rape is not the case in india . if you have married the girl you are legally given the ticket to coerce her to have sex with you even when she don't want. I.e. when she is openly saying she don't want.
    There are so many girls who get married at minor ages and please don't tell me they wanted to have sex..
    Many a times they keep quiet and think its their duty to fulfill the whims n fantasies of their partner as this is what they are for.. To serve.
    There are a many cases when a woman suffers n suffers only to be told by the court that it wasn't rape. And the woman can only take divorce.. Or at most get charges of assault n beating which are NOT same as rape. If something like this happens to a family member em sorry but I would be aghast at the failure of the system to call a rape a rape and guilty to be punished according to the crime...

    Having said this... Its a very difficult thing to decide when they lady is giving her consent when not. Law could easily and very easily be misused because no body knows what exactly was the situation in the bed room. So how can court or other people decide. Woman can blame get bruises made up .. Will that be justified as rape..coz nobody saw it. So just like that the genuine cases won't get the due attention and lot of machinery will be spending time n energy fighting for those many who put false charges.


    Plus the fact that divorces will increase isn't true.. Jinko divorce Lena hai vo le he lenge.. Man or woman both..

    My final call-- what about the genuine case?? The girl who was actually raped , coerced ??
    What about her! Many laws can be misused and we can have proper rules made up to avoid its misuse.. I think a girl who is raped can be easily identified from those who made it up.. We are even now seeing many cases where false rape charges are put and they are caught! So same will be done.
    And as far as taking bed room to court is concerned when the man who raped didn't cared before rapeing should the woman care?? In the other case when the man is innocent... I think if a woman is falsely charging him of rape, they are already at the level where family is already broken.And the rape charge can be investigated properly. So this law will break families is nothing but a stupid concept.
    I guess while giving this example you are not assuming that marital rape can only happen to women. Taking rare case, man should be allowed to say "No" and wife should not persue. Law should be gender neutral.
    On personal level, I don't trust our judiciary. Justice delayed is justice denied.
  • as per the current position the laws against men are highly loaded.
    sec 498a and related sections are used by many for their benefits.i have seen enough cases where women have framed false charges against her husband and in laws just to harass them and to get a fat money to settle disputes.this fact masks the fact for those who actually need the law.the draconian provisions of section are also being misused by police and lawyers lobby for their own benefits.

    remember the punishment for a false case is 10 times lower than the provision of being falsely accused.

    marital rape is a reality in rural semi urban areas,where the women are actually not empowered of their rights in any case.in metro areas marital rape will be an added burden on the lengthy judicial system.

    the best course of action in such cases will be to use civil provisions like immediate divorce and fines rather than criminal course of action.

    it will be a far better idea for the system to increase provisions for public safety of women,in transportation,factories,offices and amending provisions for false complains,speeding up judicial process and provide educational and employment avenues for women.
    "i am the guy doing my job,you must be the other guy."
  • Rape is a reality in India and so is marital rape.But there is clear socio-economic division between empowered ,urban women,who are seldom raped and they pose a danger of misusing the law as has been the case in section 498A,as against the gullible ,less aware women from rural and semi-urban areas.To strike a balance ,owing to larger patriarchal mindsets and biased attitude towards women,a law is definitely needed with enough safeguards to demoralise the false petitioners and speedy justice.
  • Amazing insight of ppl... if a married man coerce his wife for sex it's rape..but when a married woman coerc her husband for sex then there is no word for it...

    There are words for man... But just tell how many boys are raped each day in India? Sounds funny right.. Asking about each day...
    I am not saying that one man being violated is a lesser crime and there should be laws for them too but
    "You can talk of gender neutrality when their is gender equality"
  • Argument that a law can be misused so there should be no law is a self defeating .And raise above narrow identities of sex,caste,creed,race,nationality rather protecting the innocent and justice should be our concern
    I differ. Reality is that laws are misused. Law can be there but penalty for misusing should be same as penalty for marital rape.

    Not like in recent false rape case, complainant fined rs. 500 and punishment to standing few hour in court.

    Every law as scope of misusing and lot are misused and penalties differ accordingly since you are guy you are male identity is
    taking over emotionally and trying support your argument by quoting facts out context without of knowing nitty gritty of case and quoting 500 fine and taking things out of context,even if true in a country of 1 billion there is scope for lot exceptions so dont make it a rule
  • there are lots of gays these days especially in ORN and MN..........beware guys...be safe.. :))
    Our survival instinct is our single greatest source of inspiration. - Dr. Mann
  • there are lots of gays these days especially in ORN and MN..........beware guys...be safe.. :))
    =))
  • Here people are authoritatively claiming that marital rape is a widely spread reality. Are there any empirical evidence to prove it?
    Did anyone come across a real example of victim of marital rape in their interaction with friends and acquaintances?

    And if women is that powerless as some of us here thinks ( ask a married man, you will know who holds the power in marital relationship) then even if husband is jailed for 10 years and she gets divorce even then here status in society will not be much better with added stigma of "divocee" and getting her husband to jail
  • edited September 2015
    Amazing insight of ppl... if a married man coerce his wife for sex it's rape..but when a married woman coerc her husband for sex then there is no word for it...

    There are words for man... But just tell how many boys are raped each day in India? Sounds funny right.. Asking about each day...
    I am not saying that one man being violated is a lesser crime and there should be laws for them too but
    "You can talk of gender neutrality when their is gender equality"
    We can never know because our media and ngo never feel to do survey for men... but there are survey which shows how women uses these these provisions to torture men...
    Gender equality can only be reached if women/law too start practising gender neutrality and stop their biased behavior towards men...
    Do you know that no. of suicide for married men is more than double than that of women...approx 2.5 times of women...
    I vow to win.... !!!
  • yahan sab golmaal h...banda kahe ki padhai pe invest kiya h to dowry chahiye to ye bhi criminal bana diya, ab ye bande ki free will nahi....he should have independence to decide conditions for marriage just like girls decide whether to marry unemployed or not.
    Male or female chahe ki sirf male child chahte h..vo bhi criminal...ab vo bhi criminal. why should govt. regulate social choices of people.
    waise freedom of expression and other bull shit ...Lekin Sab selective......State should be police state only that is concerned with law and order only. It should not dictate people's choices whether social, economical...But govt .....
  • edited September 2015
    @Mistletoe


    image


    Why is that men suicide rate sharply decrease after he is been divorsed but so high in his marriage life...
    jpg
    jpg
    Screenshot_2015-09-25-22-45-08_1443201342372.jpg
    213K
    I vow to win.... !!!
  • ab yahi dekh lo acc. today's TH editorial on sedition
    Section 124A of IPC will apply for criticism of high official showing him as representative of government . an koi muje ye batao ki jab politicians and high official apni authority govt . se derive karte h...to fir unhe govt. ka representative kyon na kaha jaaye.

    Freedom of expression tabhi tak jab tak govt. ko convenient lage....ye kya bakwaas h
  • @T.e. Raju about empirical evidence-many woman don't report because we know how a divorced woman is seen by our society. Many in rural India don't even know that its rape.. They consider it there duty just like the man considers it his legal right to have sex with his wife even when she is a minor.

    But here the law being bought will not be dealing with these cases obviously because anybody taking matter to court simply wants a divorce and family is already broken n society already had its laugh . Such issues are dealt mostly between husband and wife and I don't think they move to court.
    Here the law will be in use for woman "who know its a rape" and they are raped.. I.e. having forceful sexual intercourse without permission. And when the word force is there we can not deny that the girl would simply have agreed , it leads to assualt , torture etc.
    ..Fact that this law will me misused is totally true and will be one more waepon in hands of "many" woman who make false charges to get divorce, or when their is extra marital affair involved, to take revenge etc. But to say we don't "need" a law because we are incabaple of sensitizing the society, of carrying out proper investigation won't be right I think.

    We need to consider a rape a rape whether inside or outside marriage. That's all. Why all hue n cry. Should a law be there yes totally.
  • The best solution to this problem is to end marriage as an institution... it will solve all problem... <:-P
    I vow to win.... !!!
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