All those who attempted this essay, kindly post the structure and main points of your essay.
Major themes of my essay were:-
1) Introduction with how Robert J. Oppenheimer (Chief Scientist of Manhattan Project) quoted the Bhagwad Gita, after the first atomic test was successfully conducted by the United States. His remark on the future of humanity, how it would never be the same once a power of such magnitude takes birth. [ Note:- I got this idea from watching a short youtube clip just a week back while I was killing time on the internet in the guise of preparation. Posting it here for reference:-
Theme of the introduction focused on how the dynamics of the world changed after the nuclear tests. Whether power was accompanied with equivalent responsibility or not.
2) Body focused on:-
the evolution of power-responsibility matrix right from the start of civilization- Matsyaya Nyaya / Law of the Jungle and the Survival of the Fittest doctrine to the present day structure of modern governance. How the concept of power and responsibility has changed in the course of human history.
What power means for an individual ,for a society and for a nation. How the ensuing responsibility accompanies power. Gave few examples with respect to each category
As I went further, I explained different kinds of power and how Knowledge itself is the biggest form of power and how it brings along the burden of responsibility in terms of sharing that knowledge
Towards the end of body, I focused on the concept of Responsible power, how power remains relevant only when it gets rightfully transferred to responsible people. Few other points which I do not remember
3) In the conclusion, I began with a quote- its not power that corrupts men, its men who corrupt power. Explained this quote a little bit. Then towards the end, I discussed the purpose of responsible power by quoting and explaining the Bhagwad Gita once again. [Note:- I have started and ended my essay by quoting the Gita as I feel that entire book is based on this very premise of power and responsibility]
People with whom I discussed my essay have told me that first of all, I shouldn't have picked up an abstract/philosophical topic. Secondly, my essay does not look "secular" in tone.
PS:- My previous two endeavors with UPSC have been halted because of my essay marks. I got 65 in 2012 when I attempted the PPP essay. What is ironical is that I had managed to get 125 in Paper 2 of PubAd, of which PPP is a core topic. Then in 2013, I got 70. I always wrote in a simple language, putting no quotes and never digressed from the topics. So this time I took the risk of picking up a philosophical topic and wrote my essay in a philosophical language as well because seriously, what have I got to lose! I have to admit that after managing to get only 28% marks in my essay attempted on Colonial Mentality, this essay was written with a slight sense of contempt towards UPSC. Not seeing your name in the final list solely because of essay marks makes one care lesser and lesser.
Please share your feedback and the points which you included. Secondly, does UPSC ever give high marks in a philosophical essay? If you know of any examples then please let me know in order to help me sleep better in this period of wait! Thanks!