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Getting over someone

Hello guys,
I am engineering graduate of 2012 batch from a tier 1 institute. After graduation I worked for a couple of years and entered into civils preparation from 2014. I have appeared for civils 4 times and failed to qualify mains every time.
Finally this year I joined a PSB and decided to take some time off. I was hoping that this break would rejuvenate me. But a few events have transpired that have made me a bit more depressed and distracted me.

During the training period I got attracted to one of my batchmates. She was in my presentation group and we interacted quite a lot. We even went out on a couple of occasions for normal dinner. We have both been allotted different branches but are in the same station. We even met a couple of times after being allocated branches. During all our interactions I have tried to drop her hints of being attracted to her, but have been unable to understand if she really took them. Finally last week I conveyed my feelings to her over watsapp. But her reaction was that she had never thought about me in that manner.

Since then I have had no communication with her, but inside me I want to talk to her. Majority of times I end up fantasizing situations if I would had done things differently. This is impacting my health as I have started to smoke and drink heavily. Also I have been unable to focus on my studies even a single bit.

It would be great if someone here could guide me how to overcome this obsession. Should I meet that girl once and clear up all the things or should I just ignore her. If ignore, then kindly suggest how as well since it is very difficult for me to forget her.

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Comments

  • Ignore maaro us ladki ko.

    Ek Se badh kar ek Haseenaayein hain yaar samaaj mein. Beauty with brains bhi hain kuch toh.

    Kabhi bhi ek ke peeche Baawlaa Bhoot NAHI hona bhai.

    Agar is saal exam de rahe ho toh Prelims par thoda dhyaan laga do bhai. Kyonki Prelims mein is saal hadd se zyaada competition hai.

    Aur agar is saal Exam NAHI de rahe ho aap toh bhi Usko Ignore maaro..
  • Typical behaviour
    Refer : https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/

    Dont be beta , invest time in understanding TRP (link shared above) when free
    once again HUSTLE
  • Ignore maaro us ladki ko.

    Ek Se badh kar ek Haseenaayein hain yaar samaaj mein. Beauty with brains bhi hain kuch toh.

    Kabhi bhi ek ke peeche Baawlaa Bhoot NAHI hona bhai.

    Agar is saal exam de rahe ho toh Prelims par thoda dhyaan laga do bhai. Kyonki Prelims mein is saal hadd se zyaada competition hai.

    Aur agar is saal Exam NAHI de rahe ho aap toh bhi Usko Ignore maaro..

    @Ivan_TheTerrible aur aap ise ignore maaro Ye sab angel priya ke rishtedaar hai. :angry:
    You better be careful kid
  • edited March 22

    Typical behaviour
    Refer : https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/

    Dont be beta , invest time in understanding TRP (link shared above) when free

    @tootadil dont go to this subreddit, its full of misogyny, and of the most controversial/infamous subreddit there.


    My two bits, apart from what ivan bhai has suggested., you must convey all your feelings honestly to her, before moving on. either by mail/text or f2f. why to carry some baggage, and loving someone is no offence.

    after that remember the maxim that, its futile to have one-sided love. so forget it.
    But relying on drink/smoke to cure emotional hurting has more adverse effect than benefit.

  • Ignore maaro us ladki ko.

    Ek Se badh kar ek Haseenaayein hain yaar samaaj mein. Beauty with brains bhi hain kuch toh.

    Kabhi bhi ek ke peeche Baawlaa Bhoot NAHI hona bhai.

    Agar is saal exam de rahe ho toh Prelims par thoda dhyaan laga do bhai. Kyonki Prelims mein is saal hadd se zyaada competition hai.

    Aur agar is saal Exam NAHI de rahe ho aap toh bhi Usko Ignore maaro..

    @Ivan_TheTerrible aur aap ise ignore maaro Ye sab angel priya ke rishtedaar hai. :angry:
    Ohhhh... This Chatur has become so Chatur.. trapping everyone by incessantly making such threads every other day.
  • tootadil said:

    Hello guys,
    I am engineering graduate of 2012 batch from a tier 1 institute. After graduation I worked for a couple of years and entered into civils preparation from 2014. I have appeared for civils 4 times and failed to qualify mains every time.
    Finally this year I joined a PSB and decided to take some time off. I was hoping that this break would rejuvenate me. But a few events have transpired that have made me a bit more depressed and distracted me.

    During the training period I got attracted to one of my batchmates. She was in my presentation group and we interacted quite a lot. We even went out on a couple of occasions for normal dinner. We have both been allotted different branches but are in the same station. We even met a couple of times after being allocated branches. During all our interactions I have tried to drop her hints of being attracted to her, but have been unable to understand if she really took them. Finally last week I conveyed my feelings to her over watsapp. But her reaction was that she had never thought about me in that manner.

    Since then I have had no communication with her, but inside me I want to talk to her. Majority of times I end up fantasizing situations if I would had done things differently. This is impacting my health as I have started to smoke and drink heavily. Also I have been unable to focus on my studies even a single bit.

    It would be great if someone here could guide me how to overcome this obsession. Should I meet that girl once and clear up all the things or should I just ignore her. If ignore, then kindly suggest how as well since it is very difficult for me to forget her.

    Ladki ko bhulna
    Hahaha
    Woh bhi one sided wali ko
    Simple block kar do
    Try and hit on other girl
    Yaahan koi bolta ki I was with that girl for 5 years tab toh koi saalah bhi deta
    A few week and one sided phir bhi problem

  • Dont waste ur time anymore.
    She ll never get interested in u.
    Hunt alone
  • Typical behaviour
    Refer : https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/

    Dont be beta , invest time in understanding TRP (link shared above) when free

    @tootadil dont go to this subreddit, its full of misogyny, and of the most controversial/infamous subreddit there.


    My two bits, apart from what ivan bhai has suggested., you must convey all your feelings honestly to her, before moving on. either by mail/text or f2f. why to carry some baggage, and loving someone is no offence.

    after that remember the maxim that, its futile to have one-sided love. so forget it.
    But relying on drink/smoke to cure emotional hurting has more adverse effect than benefit.

    You are grossly mistaken TRP works
    once again HUSTLE
  • edited March 22
    I suggest you have a talk with her in person. Tell her that its fine and you would like to stay on friendly terms. Confessing on whatsapp and then pretending nothing happens makes things even more awkward.

    Ruminating on what you could have done differently happens to all of us. However the point is, no matter what you do or dont do, if the girl isnt attracted to you, thats the end of the matter.

    Perhaps she sensed your hints and chose not to notice them because she didnt want to reciprocate your feelings. Women arent as clueless as they say to men.

    Either way, make things amicable again by being a gentleman. Who knows she may be interested in you in the future if she gets to know you better?

    Whatever the case, its better to clear things up in person rather than text.

    Why go into a negative spiral over what you could have done? Think about what is really important and what you can control (aka studies).
  • Wish before break up : Bajate Raho

    Reality after break up : Hilate Raho
    Many reasons to remain still happy.

    Any one in Delhi willing to learn the toughest part of Philosophy i.e. contemporary western philosophy, in the easiest and simplest way can inbox me. Its free.
  • ये naughty raja है नए नए हथकंडे लेकर आता है और लोग इसके जाल में फँस जाते हैं I
    रोज नयी नयी प्रोफाइल बना कर लोगों को मूर्ख बनाना इसका पेशा है।
    इतनी गज़ब की अभिनय क्षमता तो पेशेवर भिख्मन्गो में ही दिखती है।
    और इसके चक्कर में जेन्युइन लोग बेचारे पर कोई ध्यान भी नहीं देता।
    कुछ तो शर्म करो @naughty raja
  • edited March 22
    What is love ?

    Love is a dynamic concept with its ingredients varying over time and space.

    For example, Love during UPSC prep can be defined as follows :smile:


    For men : Sexual desire driven by availability of liberty and freedom granted by independent/non-interfering room culture/parks in Delhi.

    For women : Greed developed out of perception of an aspirant with potential to succeed or guide in prep.

    Many reasons to remain still happy.

    Any one in Delhi willing to learn the toughest part of Philosophy i.e. contemporary western philosophy, in the easiest and simplest way can inbox me. Its free.
  • और यहाँ कुछ लोग सेक्स , ब्रेक अप , पोर्न , दारु , मुर्गा का अपना ब्रम्ह ज्ञान लेकर प्रगट हो जाते हैं।
    ऐसा लगता है कि मिथुन की फिल्मो के खलनायकों की महासभा प्रारम्भ हो गयी हो।
  • plz listen to this great song ...for all broken hearts


  • ये naughty raja है नए नए हथकंडे लेकर आता है और लोग इसके जाल में फँस जाते हैं I
    रोज नयी नयी प्रोफाइल बना कर लोगों को मूर्ख बनाना इसका पेशा है।
    इतनी गज़ब की अभिनय क्षमता तो पेशेवर भिख्मन्गो में ही दिखती है।
    और इसके चक्कर में जेन्युइन लोग बेचारे पर कोई ध्यान भी नहीं देता।
    कुछ तो शर्म करो @naughty raja

    Just to clarify, this is the first time I have posted such a question on forum. Although I have another forum profile as well, but did not want to use that since many people know me personally.

    Sincere apologies if anyone felt distracted/ offended by this post of mine.

    I have been in genuine trouble and just wanted some suggestions.
  • Tujhe dekh kar uske armaan nahi jaagte honge bhai samajh is baat ko uski galti na hai.
  • edited March 22
    Ghonchu naughty raja...kuch to sharm kar.....chappal phekke maaro ise.
    Sabka maalik domino
  • tootadil said:

    ये naughty raja है नए नए हथकंडे लेकर आता है और लोग इसके जाल में फँस जाते हैं I
    रोज नयी नयी प्रोफाइल बना कर लोगों को मूर्ख बनाना इसका पेशा है।
    इतनी गज़ब की अभिनय क्षमता तो पेशेवर भिख्मन्गो में ही दिखती है।
    और इसके चक्कर में जेन्युइन लोग बेचारे पर कोई ध्यान भी नहीं देता।
    कुछ तो शर्म करो @naughty raja

    Just to clarify, this is the first time I have posted such a question on forum. Although I have another forum profile as well, but did not want to use that since many people know me personally.

    Sincere apologies if anyone felt distracted/ offended by this post of mine.

    I have been in genuine trouble and just wanted some suggestions.
    इस गूढ़ विषय पर फोरम के सिद्ध पुरूषों द्वारा पहले की काफी प्रवचन दिए जा चुके हैं। हिंदी फिल्मों में भी काफी ज्ञानवर्धक बातें मिल जाएंगी। अतएव नए थ्रेड को खोलने की कोई आवश्यकता मुझे नहीं लगती। फिर भी यदि आप वास्तविकता में प्रेम रोगी हैं तो आपके साथ मेरी सहनुभूति है।
    क्षमा प्रार्थी हूँ .... छोटा भाई समझ कर माफ़ कर दें।
  • tootadil said:

    ये naughty raja है नए नए हथकंडे लेकर आता है और लोग इसके जाल में फँस जाते हैं I
    रोज नयी नयी प्रोफाइल बना कर लोगों को मूर्ख बनाना इसका पेशा है।
    इतनी गज़ब की अभिनय क्षमता तो पेशेवर भिख्मन्गो में ही दिखती है।
    और इसके चक्कर में जेन्युइन लोग बेचारे पर कोई ध्यान भी नहीं देता।
    कुछ तो शर्म करो @naughty raja

    Just to clarify, this is the first time I have posted such a question on forum. Although I have another forum profile as well, but did not want to use that since many people know me personally.

    Sincere apologies if anyone felt distracted/ offended by this post of mine.

    I have been in genuine trouble and just wanted some suggestions.
    इस गूढ़ विषय पर फोरम के सिद्ध पुरूषों द्वारा पहले की काफी प्रवचन दिए जा चुके हैं। हिंदी फिल्मों में भी काफी ज्ञानवर्धक बातें मिल जाएंगी। अतएव नए थ्रेड को खोलने की कोई आवश्यकता मुझे नहीं लगती। फिर भी यदि आप वास्तविकता में प्रेम रोगी हैं तो आपके साथ मेरी सहनुभूति है।
    क्षमा प्रार्थी हूँ .... छोटा भाई समझ कर माफ़ कर दें।
    Ye naughty raja hi hein..
    Sabka maalik domino
  • domino said:

    tootadil said:

    ये naughty raja है नए नए हथकंडे लेकर आता है और लोग इसके जाल में फँस जाते हैं I
    रोज नयी नयी प्रोफाइल बना कर लोगों को मूर्ख बनाना इसका पेशा है।
    इतनी गज़ब की अभिनय क्षमता तो पेशेवर भिख्मन्गो में ही दिखती है।
    और इसके चक्कर में जेन्युइन लोग बेचारे पर कोई ध्यान भी नहीं देता।
    कुछ तो शर्म करो @naughty raja

    Just to clarify, this is the first time I have posted such a question on forum. Although I have another forum profile as well, but did not want to use that since many people know me personally.

    Sincere apologies if anyone felt distracted/ offended by this post of mine.

    I have been in genuine trouble and just wanted some suggestions.
    इस गूढ़ विषय पर फोरम के सिद्ध पुरूषों द्वारा पहले की काफी प्रवचन दिए जा चुके हैं। हिंदी फिल्मों में भी काफी ज्ञानवर्धक बातें मिल जाएंगी। अतएव नए थ्रेड को खोलने की कोई आवश्यकता मुझे नहीं लगती। फिर भी यदि आप वास्तविकता में प्रेम रोगी हैं तो आपके साथ मेरी सहनुभूति है।
    क्षमा प्रार्थी हूँ .... छोटा भाई समझ कर माफ़ कर दें।
    Ye naughty raja hi hein..
    वो तो इसकी इंग्लिश लैंग्वेज लेखन को ही देख कर समझ में आ गया।
    ऐसा फ्लो सिर्फ नॉटी राजा की लेखनी में ही नज़र आता है।
  • कोई और प्रेम रोगी हो तो वो भी यहाँ दर्शन दे दे।
    आओ ज्ञान की अविरल धारा में आप भी स्नान कर लो।
    इस नॉटी राजा को तो अकादमी पुरस्कार से सम्मानित किया जाना चाहिए ,
    नौटंकी का भारत रत्न भी मिलना चाहिए।
    और इन सबसे बढ़कर फोरम के तथाकथित महाज्ञानी स्वयंभू सिद्ध पुरुषों ..... प्रेम गुरुओं को तो भारतवर्ष से तड़ीपार कर देना चाहिएI इंटरनेट पे एक से बढ़कर एक अश्लील प्रकृति का ज्ञान सर्वथा मुफ्त में उपलब्ध है .....अबे तो तुम सब की ज़रूरत किसे है ? UPSC तो निकलने से रहा.... किसी अश्लील वेबसाइट के लिए स्टार्टअप क्यों नहीं शुरू कर देते तुम लोग ....!!!
  • domino said:

    Ghonchu naughty raja...kuch to sharm kar.....chappal phekke maaro ise.

    Hahahaha pakde Gaye.. ghonchu word..

    Kaise ho Mishra ji :blush:
  • pizzza said:

    domino said:

    Ghonchu naughty raja...kuch to sharm kar.....chappal phekke maaro ise.

    Hahahaha pakde Gaye.. ghonchu word..

    Kaise ho Mishra ji :blush:
    should i say it to u in kannada that i am not mishra..
    Sabka maalik domino
  • What is love ?

    Love is a dynamic concept with its ingredients varying over time and space.

    For example, Love during UPSC prep can be defined as follows :smile:


    For men : Sexual desire driven by availability of liberty and freedom granted by independent/non-interfering room culture/parks in Delhi.

    For women : Greed developed out of perception of an aspirant with potential to succeed or guide in prep.

    Very turely defined the motivation and reasons behind this. Another thing is girls aspirants in orn always give equal tratment to many boys because theg different different benefit from boys. They dont want loose any boys in the name of friends and they always ride on multiple boats and always seek a complete package. During there game many boys got stuck and waste precious time ,energy and money and get nothing.
  • Prateek.v said:

    What is love ?

    Love is a dynamic concept with its ingredients varying over time and space.

    For example, Love during UPSC prep can be defined as follows :smile:


    For men : Sexual desire driven by availability of liberty and freedom granted by independent/non-interfering room culture/parks in Delhi.

    For women : Greed developed out of perception of an aspirant with potential to succeed or guide in prep.

    Very turely defined the motivation and reasons behind this. Another thing is girls aspirants in orn always give equal tratment to many boys because theg different different benefit from boys. They dont want loose any boys in the name of friends and they always ride on multiple boats and always seek a complete package. During there game many boys got stuck and waste precious time ,energy and money and get nothing.
    That happened with me too :joy:
    Never told the guy that i like him, he ‘assumed’ probably because he had no other girl in his life right then.

    Let me make it easier for you.
    You have a boy as friend ? How close are you. And girls also have girl friends.
    But when a girl and boy become friend its the boy who decides if he had been taken advantage of.

    As if boys dont help other boys.
    Girls dont help or seek help from other girls.

    Problem is its okay da. If a girl says that she doesn’t think of you as a lover. You are not one of those kinds who ‘give’ favours in return or in perceived thought of having returns from the girl. Are you!?
    And you are not fool enough to go bankrupt after a girl who has never even accepted your proposal.

    Stop showing yourselves as naive , easily taken for a ride kind of boy. You guys are mature enough to not be turned into a boat :joy:

    Comming to the moot point again - do you not help boys? Do you expect them to think that you are their best friend because you have helped them?
    Or girls don’t seek help from girls?

    It is because we all have a basic nature of seeking help (many egoistic people don’t) that we end up asking for guidance/help. Now boys don’t do that very often in case they have to ask it from a girl because it is assumed that if a girl can do this then obviously you can, so you don’t need to ask her help.

    Try seeking help from girls without being the line marne wala kind , i think you will find girls who help and seek help both.

    Cheers to the future :)

    Kindly stop acting like a victim when a girl has clearly said no. And if you don’t want to be taken ‘advantage’ of :joy: why don’t you come to this basic at start of a relationship. Madame i am helping you considering/thinking you will be my gf. Is that okay? And please take a yes or no. Likewise decide your action. Just so you don’t feel like somebody took your advantage :joy:

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  • Prateek.v said:

    What is love ?

    Love is a dynamic concept with its ingredients varying over time and space.

    For example, Love during UPSC prep can be defined as follows :smile:


    For men : Sexual desire driven by availability of liberty and freedom granted by independent/non-interfering room culture/parks in Delhi.

    For women : Greed developed out of perception of an aspirant with potential to succeed or guide in prep.

    Very turely defined the motivation and reasons behind this. Another thing is girls aspirants in orn always give equal tratment to many boys because theg different different benefit from boys. They dont want loose any boys in the name of friends and they always ride on multiple boats and always seek a complete package. During there game many boys got stuck and waste precious time ,energy and money and get nothing.
    Exactly !
    Many reasons to remain still happy.

    Any one in Delhi willing to learn the toughest part of Philosophy i.e. contemporary western philosophy, in the easiest and simplest way can inbox me. Its free.
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  • फोरम के तथाकथित महाज्ञानी स्वयंभू सिद्ध पुरुषों ..... प्रेम गुरुओं ki ek durlabh tasveer










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  • ruush said:

    Prateek.v said:

    What is love ?

    Love is a dynamic concept with its ingredients varying over time and space.

    For example, Love during UPSC prep can be defined as follows :smile:


    For men : Sexual desire driven by availability of liberty and freedom granted by independent/non-interfering room culture/parks in Delhi.

    For women : Greed developed out of perception of an aspirant with potential to succeed or guide in prep.

    Very turely defined the motivation and reasons behind this. Another thing is girls aspirants in orn always give equal tratment to many boys because theg different different benefit from boys. They dont want loose any boys in the name of friends and they always ride on multiple boats and always seek a complete package. During there game many boys got stuck and waste precious time ,energy and money and get nothing.
    That happened with me too :joy:
    Never told the guy that i like him, he ‘assumed’ probably because he had no other girl in his life right then.

    Let me make it easier for you.
    You have a boy as friend ? How close are you. And girls also have girl friends.
    But when a girl and boy become friend its the boy who decides if he had been taken advantage of.

    As if boys dont help other boys.
    Girls dont help or seek help from other girls.

    Problem is its okay da. If a girl says that she doesn’t think of you as a lover. You are not one of those kinds who ‘give’ favours in return or in perceived thought of having returns from the girl. Are you!?
    And you are not fool enough to go bankrupt after a girl who has never even accepted your proposal.

    Stop showing yourselves as naive , easily taken for a ride kind of boy. You guys are mature enough to not be turned into a boat :joy:

    Comming to the moot point again - do you not help boys? Do you expect them to think that you are their best friend because you have helped them?
    Or girls don’t seek help from girls?

    It is because we all have a basic nature of seeking help (many egoistic people don’t) that we end up asking for guidance/help. Now boys don’t do that very often in case they have to ask it from a girl because it is assumed that if a girl can do this then obviously you can, so you don’t need to ask her help.

    Try seeking help from girls without being the line marne wala kind , i think you will find girls who help and seek help both.

    Cheers to the future :)

    Kindly stop acting like a victim when a girl has clearly said no. And if you don’t want to be taken ‘advantage’ of :joy: why don’t you come to this basic at start of a relationship. Madame i am helping you considering/thinking you will be my gf. Is that okay? And please take a yes or no. Likewise decide your action. Just so you don’t feel like somebody took your advantage :joy:
    After all its a bitter truth. If u dont want to accept the reality then its ok. Think if a girl is seking help from a boy she must calculate something in all sphere. Isnt it ??
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