I have been preparing for UPSC CSE for the last 4.5 years.
2014- Did not appear
2015- Out of the Prelims 2015( Did not study much-got distracted).
2016-Gave Mains exam but did not clear.
2017-Out of Prelims by a close margin.
Just 2-3 months before the Prelims 2016, I started studying in a focused manner. I cleared the Prelims this time. I gave Mains 2016 but did not clear by 130 marks. However, one positive was that I had scored good marks in Essay-140.
I was also juggling SSC CGL 2016. Cleared its Tier-1 with good marks(170) but could not give time to Tier-2. Scored low in Maths TIer-2(105). I just cleared the cut-off for Tier-3 and Tier-4 which happened in 2017.
As it happens to many of us, I got complacent after the Mains 2016. It became difficult to start my studies again. But I struggled. I also lost some time and willpower preparing for SSC CGL Tier-3 and Tier-4. I was confident that I would clear CSE Prelims 2017. Due to this overconfidence, I did not work as hard as I should have. I just missed the cut-off.
My folks wanted me to clear SSC CGL 2017 and focus less on UPSC. I gave myself time solely for CGL but I did not/ could not study Maths for Tier-2( I don't know why I don't feel like studying Maths).
As I was getting worried about my future, I gave TISS NET 2018 which I cleared for HRM & LM at Mumbai campus. Now, I am confused between TISS, CGL, and UPSC. I never wanted CGL and TISS. I am not well prepared for CGL Maths Tier-2. For UPSC, I need to make notes for the optional as without them I am not able to perform well in the Mains. Prelims exam is approaching and I have to focus more if I want to clear it(lower vacancies, last time did not clear).
Should I prepare for GD/PI for the TISS? Should I join TISS if I clear the exam? Joining TISS would mean saying goodbye to UPSC. On one hand, UPSC is a dream that I have nurtured for long. It is difficult to give up. On the other hand, it is getting difficult to study and there is an uncertainty in UPSC. I want to clear UPSC.
There is an issue of the time gap for selection in TISS and placement after the course. What should I do? Please help.