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What is my fault! Should I quit this exam

Please moderators do not close this thread . I am old member of this community. Made this account to write this because. I am an engineering graduate from NIT, passed out in 2010. My optional were Pub Ad and Mechanical Eng and now mechanical.
Gave 1st attempt in 2011. Missed interview call by 1 mark.
In 2012 failed in pre by 1 marks.
In 2013 reached till interview fell short of 5 marks. got just 71 marks in essay.
In 2014 mains went well. But i was shocked to see that i failed to clear compulsory Hindi paper. Got just 51 marks. I have read Hindi till class 12th and got 96 in 10th and 95 in 12th CBSE board.
I was placed in Caterpillar Inc. in campus placement but did not joined it as I wanted to prepare for this exam. . My GF,s parents have fixed her marriage somewhere. My mother who is a staunch believer in astrology( I am from Srinagar,Uttarakhand and people here belive a lot in astrology) showed my horoscope to our family pandit and he said that in 2010 mine Rahu Dasha has started so it is not possible to get something big for atleast 9 years; total duration of rahu is 18 years. And so it is futile to give any further attempts as its not in my destiny. Now my parents are forcing me to take some job. I am 26 rite now.
So now family support has started eroding. My Gf is soon going to leave me forever. And i am still jobless after 4.5 years of graduation. What should I do? I was a good student throughout my life. But now I have nothing left in life.
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Comments

  • Dude, sorry to hear but don't let failure in this exam define your life course.

    In some years, when you will be happy in life with an amazing family, you will realize how fruitless and stupid your thoughts were.

    you are 26 now with 2 more attempts to go. I would suggest find a job if possible, travel, exercise, make some new friends, party - don't be too hard on yourself. We become so enmeshed in this whole process that we forget to live postponing everything to the future. I am sure you will be able to bounce back much better. After 4 attempts, there isn't much left to do besides current affairs so you can definitely handle a job.

    As far as astrologers are concerned, a guy with me in NIT Bhopal wasted 4 years after 12th because his astrologer told him that he will definitely make it to IITs. Sun, Moon, Mars or Saturn are not going to conspire against you in this exam - that is a fact. Enjoy a good night's sleep, everything will be alright when the morning comes. Cheers!!!!
    All generalizations are false including this one
    Fascinating Universe -
  • edited July 2015
    @sridev suman Bhai life is testing you...more than most others.....tension na le...agar aap is test me paas ho gaye app sabki [content removed]
    This account's purpose has been served. Carry on.
  • I have been facing this situation the moment I saw my marks.preparing for cse since my college days got 133.33 in gs1 and 136 in gs2.left so many job offers in order to pursue my dream.but when I saw my marks I learnt that I failed in hindi got only 54 don't know this happened.
    Now I have to start from scratch again without even knowing how much marks I got in other paper.I don't fear failure but not knowing where I failed is what bothers me.
    anyways would give another shot have given capf exam getting 170+ score in paper1.but today learnt an important lession never stake ur life for any exam
    2014-1st attempt,mains--pol science

  • Since you have appeared for this exam 4 times and have already reached the interview stage, you are too wise to succumb to anything untoward. GFs come and go. Dont get attached. I stayed abroad for 5 years in pursuit of a girl. In hindsight, it wasnt very wise. Love fools.

  • Bhai 2015 mein poori jaan laga do.
    Life is a gift from God. Most precious gift. Donot even think of ending it for something as trivial as an exam.
  • Please moderators do not close this thread . I am old member of this community. Made this account to write this because. I am an engineering graduate from NIT, passed out in 2010. My optional were Pub Ad and Mechanical Eng and now mechanical.
    Gave 1st attempt in 2011. Missed interview call by 1 mark.
    In 2012 failed in pre by 1 marks.
    In 2013 reached till interview fell short of 5 marks. got just 71 marks in essay.
    In 2014 mains went well. But i was shocked to see that i failed to clear compulsory Hindi paper. Got just 51 marks. I have read Hindi till class 12th and got 96 in 10th and 95 in 12th CBSE board.
    I was placed in Caterpillar Inc. in campus placement but did not joined it as I wanted to prepare for this exam. . My GF,s parents have fixed her marriage somewhere. My mother who is a staunch believer in astrology( I am from Srinagar,Uttarakhand and people here belive a lot in astrology) showed my horoscope to our family pandit and he said that in 2010 mine Rahu Dasha has started so it is not possible to get something big for atleast 9 years; total duration of rahu is 18 years. And so it is futile to give any further attempts as its not in my destiny. Now my parents are forcing me to take some job. I am 26 rite now.
    So now family support has started eroding. My Gf is soon going to leave me forever. And i am still jobless after 4.5 years of graduation. What should I do? I was a good student throughout my life. But now I have nothing left in life.
    You believe in astrology ? The astrologer himself doesn't know what's gonna happen to him in next 24 hours. Be rational and ignore these non sense thing.

    Life is beautiful. Don't waste it. One more attempt and give everything you have got ! I case you need any help Ping me.

    No worries ! We can discuss. :)

    Cheers !
  • edited July 2015
    Please moderators do not close this thread . I am old member of this community. Made this account to write this because. I am an engineering graduate from NIT, passed out in 2010. My optional were Pub Ad and Mechanical Eng and now mechanical.
    Gave 1st attempt in 2011. Missed interview call by 1 mark.
    In 2012 failed in pre by 1 marks.
    In 2013 reached till interview fell short of 5 marks. got just 71 marks in essay.
    In 2014 mains went well. But i was shocked to see that i failed to clear compulsory Hindi paper. Got just 51 marks. I have read Hindi till class 12th and got 96 in 10th and 95 in 12th CBSE board.
    I was placed in Caterpillar Inc. in campus placement but did not joined it as I wanted to prepare for this exam. . My GF,s parents have fixed her marriage somewhere. My mother who is a staunch believer in astrology( I am from Srinagar,Uttarakhand and people here belive a lot in astrology) showed my horoscope to our family pandit and he said that in 2010 mine Rahu Dasha has started so it is not possible to get something big for atleast 9 years; total duration of rahu is 18 years. And so it is futile to give any further attempts as its not in my destiny. Now my parents are forcing me to take some job. I am 26 rite now.
    So now family support has started eroding. My Gf is soon going to leave me forever. And i am still jobless after 4.5 years of graduation. What should I do? I was a good student throughout my life. But now I have nothing left in life.
    Bro, i will advise you to prepare for some backup exams, so that you can start working after December, and solve your girlfriend situation.

    This exam can be cruel, heartbreaking, and suck the life out of you.

    About astrology, please, let me assure you that it is nothing but horseshit. Sometimes even worse than that. People believe in bullshit like this, because they become weak, like in the situation you are now, and try to find some explanation for their problems.

    About your girlfriend, if she has a job, then this is something you too have to talk about yourself, and talk with her parents. Of course, i do not know then entire situation, so it is futile to comment. I hope it turns out good for you.

    Since it is too late for any job( govt.), give this one last attempt as i think you would have been preparing since mains result. Fill all govt. exams, like APFC, or try something in private sector from next year. You need a backup after December.

    Bro, remember, life is too important to be wasted away in this exam. Clearing it is not a proof of your worth or intelligence. The randomness of this exam takes care to undermine any genuine attempt to measure merit.

    Anyway, remember the rocky quote

    “Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!”

    So, bro, get up, and keep moving. Inch by inch, day by day, get your shit together and take back control of your life.

    Please feel free to PM me if you need any help :)
    CSE 2015. Got in.

    CSE 2016. Hopefully, the hallowed All India Services.
  • edited July 2015
    thanx for your concern. We are in a relationship since 12th class. She too prepared for cse but left after 2 attempts and took up a job in Bangalore. She is from a different caste , she is a brahmin and i am a thakur. So her parents will never agree for our marriage. Plus I am jobless. I have appeared in few state pcs but could not get a rank. And her marriage is in November. And I never believed in astrology but my parents does.At my place there is a astrologer in every house so it is obvious to get infected. At present I am not able to decide what to do. . This time I am applying for every exam. But now I am finding it difficult to concentrate. I wanted only two things in life. One , love is almost gone from my life. And CSE i dont know. These days she has stopped replying to my messages. hang up my call after 5-6 min talk. She has clearly stated that she loves her father the most and will not take any step which could bring bad name to him; when I asked her for marriage. She has made up her mind for marrying the boy her father wants.
  • Bhai, I am frankly speaking my mind here. This exam is more hyped than any other exam in the world including JEE. Once you get in the list, you will realize that your rank is not the solution to most of your problems. I find that people try studying harder or blaming themselves if they do not succeed here. But you can become an encyclopedia and still fail in the exam because there is little nexus between how much you study and what marks you get. Does it make sense to cry over such a rotten system ? The fault lies in the system and not you. Do you blame yourself for the bombings in Yemen ? Why not ? Because it is not your fault. Similarly, this is not your fault. There is absolutely nothing you could have done to avoid it after studying so hard. I salute you for your perseverance.

    If you can give the exam again without being over stressed, go ahead. If not, join another job. No job in the world is your dream job. You have to make it so. After 4-5 years, you will look back and realize how silly this all has been. Trust me !
    परित्राणाय साधूनां विनाशाय च दुष्कृताम् ।
    धर्मसंस्थापनार्थाय सम्भवामि युगे युगे |
    Assisstant Commissioner of GST and Customs - Amravati Division
    AIR-412 CSE 2014 | AIR - 450 CSE 2016 |
  • Take up a teaching job for Gate/PMT/IITJEE/11th-12th. You must be good in mechanical engg , you can easily tech physics or maths. You can easily make 30-40K in delhi with 3 hours of teaching daily . Don't go for big coaching institutes try to find some new coaching or not so well reputed as they allow you some flexibility.
    Stay in delhi...and give your last attempt.
  • edited July 2015
    Aapke liye ye do panktiyan...

    Haar nahi manunga, raar nayi thanunga, Kal ke kapal par likhta, mitata hun, Geet naya gata hun, geet naya gata hun

    Ka londiyo type rona lagaye ho bauua...sangharsh karte raho..

    Aur mantar phoonk ke maarne se safalta haath lagti to koi gareeb nhi bachta ...ee kalyug h..yaha bas matsyanyay chalta h...

    Kon kehta hain ki aasman me ched nahi ho sakta...ek patthar to tabiyat se uchal ke dekho dost...
  • Ma, u r just 26. U have an entire life to live. U have attempts. U have a good academic record. Job join karo pvt me if u are not able to concentrate now no matter how much u try. Don't be harsh on yourself. Enjoy your life. You have prepared enough. Tum upsc ki maa ch.. sakte ho job me rehte hue bhi.
  • Hello Brother,
    try to find out the meaning of hope in deeper sense , we get opportunities on this earth only where we will get in heaven or hell, so keep living..
    people will come and people will go ,nothing is permanent that you know very well, only permanent thing in life is you so try to find positive things if you allow one negative thing in life it leads to so many .so never allow ,when it comes kill it so that you can move forward .achieve your life not only exam and help the people who are suffering with the same kind of thinking(Astrology).....
    God bless you .................
  • i second gangwar for job situation.....heart break is tough, it has more negative effects than it seems...research has been done also,mind body both suffer,....but its tough to forget a girl, personal experience....since she has made up her mind, u can not do much...delete her no. , facebook, etc....flush her out...tart playing a sport or something...talk to other female friends...it will help.....and lastly...do yog(a)....it is infact relaxing......
  • Aur raha ladki ka chakkar to ek baat samjho...ladki aadmi se pyar karti h ...aur aadmi mein veerta nahi h to aadmi aadmi nahi h...matlab tum isi type ki baate agar ladki se karoge to ladki samjhegi tum ise pyar to karte ho par suraksha nahi de sakte....

    Train Bus aur LADKI khaskar...in teeno ke peeche kabhi na bhagna...ek chootti h to dusri milti h... chill maro..
  • thanx for your concern. We are in a relationship since 12th class. She too prepared for cse but left after 2 attempts and took up a job in Bangalore. She is from a different caste , she is a brahmin and i am a thakur. So her parents will never agree for our marriage. Plus I am jobless. I have appeared in few state pcs but could not get a rank. And her marriage is in November. And I never believed in astrology but my parents does.At my place there is a astrologer in every house so it is obvious to get infected. At present I am not able to decide what to do. . This time I am applying for every exam. But now I am finding it difficult to concentrate. I wanted only two things in life. One , love is almost gone from my life. And CSE i dont know. These days she has stopped replying to my messages. hang up my call after 5-6 min talk. She has clearly stated that she loves her father the most and will not take any step which could bring bad name to him; when I asked her for marriage. She has made up her mind for marrying the boy her father wants.
    Tum ho to thakur....lekin tevar tmhare thakuro wale nahi hain... dnt mind
  • Don't be disheartened... Upsc has only delayed ur selection.

    For the sake of future,

    Check the following link,
    http://forumias.com/discussion/10315/repeaters-getting-selected-again-and-again-your-views/p1

    If all vacancies are allotted,
    Cutoffs should decrease by 5-10 marks in all categories.



  • see this..only 4 minutes song..you will feel better.
  • edited July 2015
    @Billu1 you nailed it bro.

    Scenario 1
    IAS selection + Marriage to GF = Nothing Noteworthy
    In this scenario , there is no story to tell. Just average

    Scenario 2
    Your GF ditch you + IAS selection = then there is story to tell.
    After your selection , she will burn like in hell.
    That's fun. You have something to tell to others and motivate all of us about your persistence and all.

    Take a break from this relationship stuff. Enjoy
    There are guys who are in bad situation than yours.

    Few years back , there was a guy who was selected in IAS, He had lost his father just before mains .
  • About Astrology, one thing is for sure that its nothing but idiocity of the highest degree,

    REAL INCIDENT( 01-01-2015)

    Every year during new year celebrations News channels show some programme like, jaaniye kaisa rahega aaane waala saal
    1. Desh ke liye
    2. Narendra modi ke liye
    3. Amitabh, rajni sir, virat kohli, etc

    Now all they do is that they invite astrologers, numerologist, tarrot card reader to.predict their upcoming year.

    So my mechanical engineer brother ( waise its hard to find a mechanical engineer who had a girlfriend), while i was just pressing my button on remote to see something new( even that day , set max par suryavansham aur magadheera aa rahi thi) i came across this nonsense. I was waiting for predictions about arvind kejriwal( i am not an aaptard), none of them said good about him, every one predicted that bjp will form a government in delhi. In a National Television, i am sure that the channel brought the finest astrologer in their area. Next channel , same shit, still no arvind kejriwal, every one told modi ji ki kundli bahut acchi he will gain, but kejriwal wont gain anything.

    But when the result came, every one was in shock, 67-3.

    So bhai, its not kundli or rahu which determines your future, its YOU. Failure deciphers the true side of your friends and well wishers, i am sure you are working hard, but as you know complete conversion of higher grade of energy to a lower grade is not possible, there must be some where where you are losing, analyse them, rectify them and just give your best shot,
    About girlfriend stuff , i can' t say anything but i am sure you' ll be through cse.

    GOOD LUCK.


  • Aaiye hum aur aap milte hain Batuk Maharaj se!
  • 'Rise and rise again, until the lambs become lions.'
  • you are not the only one who is suffering in this world or rather in this upsc jargon. you have to remind yourself about why you started preparing for this exam
    1. to get a high profile job , marrying your love and produce children and live a happy life i.e. happy ending
    or
    2. you wanted to get into a government service and work for society and our country .

    there are so many stories which are if not bitter but as bad as yours including mine. if every one starts quitting then there won't be any success story of 5th or 6th attempt
  • you are not the only one who is suffering in this world or rather in this upsc jargon. you have to remind yourself about why you started preparing for this exam
    1. to get a high profile job , marrying your love and produce children and live a happy life i.e. happy ending
    or
    2. you wanted to get into a government service and work for society and our country .

    there are so many stories which are if not bitter but as bad as yours including mine. if every one starts quitting then there won't be any success story of 5th or 6th attempt
  • Screwed in Qualifying paper, is highly unfortunate.....wo b Hindi belt k student ka Hindi mein.
    But you should not allow this thing to be prevailed over yourself........life is much more than a failure. This was my 3rd attmpt, 2nd Mains and failure, and in both, I was on boundary, I am 28, still jobless, after 7 years of UG & 2 yrs of PG, with decent academics, Never tried for SSC-CGL, failed in UPPCS Mains and then in Prelims this year too.
    I'v PG from D.U., in Geog. and UGC-JRF too...or usi Geog. mein 200 marks b ni a paye hain...but on the basis of PG and JRF, I am applying and planning for a Ph.D. , and also applying for college lecturer posts....bcz I know, ki mn se ki gayi Padhai-likhai bekar ni jati, kabi na kabi, kisi na kisi jagah pe wo apko benifit karegi. And also, jb Bhagwan kai raaste bnd krta hai to ek-do zarur khula rkhta h.
    So you think in this way, and should never follow astrologers, parrots, rahu-ketu-shani ghost protocals.....jo apna bhavishya khud nhi jaan sakte, wo tumhara kya batayenge?......or vaise b yar......you are preparing for a service of a pure reasoning and rationale approach.......kl ko tum Assam-Meghalaya m posted rahoge to kya ye kahoge "flood to ani hi hai, bhagwan ka shaap h, precaution or relief operation se kya fayda?".....certainly you'll not do such thing.
    Friend, sometimes, testing period is so long....apke sath wohi ho rha h.....u shuld never loose your heart......or apke pass dukhi hone ka waqt b nhi h....only 39 days to go for Prelims.
    Ek tarika h, ap kahin coaching ya tution shuru kr sakte ho.....padhai se jude b rahoge or kuch income bhi. Or khud to torture mt karo....movie dekho, kabi room pe hi kuch bnakr khao, ghumo-firo, koi sath na ho to akele hi......sometimes,its good to have intra-personal talks rather than inter-personal.
    Rahi baat GF ki....try to convince her, o.w. Let her go. I know, its easy to say than reality check.....but this is another test ,Dear.

  • Essay writing practice kar rahe hai sab ke sab :P

    On a serious note, bhai search for ur own answers , other's answers wouldn't work for you . Best wishes for future endeavours :)
    It is not the eyes that are blind but the heart
  • Thank you @vuccagiri , @cantilever , @karan_004 for motivating so many of us! :)
  • @Billu1 ......bro if u want to do anything good wid ur life then just forget that girl....but how will u forget her after a decade old relationship??? my advice....leave this year's attempt..get out of ur house and join a teaching job immediately within a week in some school/clg where u might get a good salary.....just do it...and then get married...if possible then marry in this year itself.....love ur wife, take her responsibility.......study with ur job and give next years attempt with preparation...bro trust me...ur gfs memories will destroy ur career and all ur dreams....get married to a nice simple girl and get emotional stability first...only then u will move ahead in life
  • @Billu1 ......bro if u want to do anything good wid ur life then just forget that girl....but how will u forget her after a decade old relationship??? my advice....leave this year's attempt..get out of ur house and join a teaching job immediately within a week in some school/clg where u might get a good salary.....just do it...and then get married...if possible then marry in this year itself.....love ur wife, take her responsibility.......study with ur job and give next years attempt with preparation...bro trust me...ur gfs memories will destroy ur career and all ur dreams....get married to a nice simple girl and get emotional stability first...only then u will move ahead in life

    @adi007 bro you addressed the wrong guy
    hahaha
    @Billu1
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